This is my first contest! Probably my last! I’m so excited I’m busting out the colorful font and exclamation points!! And jumping out of a giant plaid coffee mug, looking a little too hyped-up on caffeine and sugar!!
In honor of my blog’s second anniversary, I would love to give away the following items to one lucky Maineiac reader:
- One snazzy official L.L. Bean baseball hat with built-in lights for those 2 am trips to the bathroom! You’ll never step on those f%$*ing Legos in the hallway again!
- One brand new, but unbelievably stinky, L.L. Bean blueberry pillow that doesn’t smell like blueberries at all, but more like you’re suffocating in a pine forest! (Really helps clear up the sinuses.)
- A lobster lollipop that doesn’t taste anything like lobster! Thank god, because that would be beyond disgusting! (my daughter had one and loved it, only to drop it onto the ground and it ended up covered in dirt and grass. I will give you the unopened one.)
- A custom-made sketch of a you! Yes! A one-of-a-kind drawing of you or your gravatar by one of the most popular artists (in my house): my husband, Jim. He’s really, really good! See above sketch from my recent cameo on The Simpsons! (if they were to ever ask me to be on a show…) And he cranked that drawing out in about 10 seconds. Just imagine what he could do if he spent a full minute on yours!
And all you have to do is:
1) Videotape yourself doing something stupid, the more embarrassing the better.
2) while videotaping, make sure you chant “She’s A Maineiac rules!” over and over. Other ideas: “She’s A Maineiac is the best blog in the known universe!” or “She’s A Maineiac saved my marriage!” or ”She’s A Maineiac cured my insomnia!”
3) Send me your videotape along with 100 bucks cold hard cash.
4) Maybe you’ll win.
5) But I doubt it.
Okay, my husband just told me this contest bites. So I’ve changed the rules.
******TO ENTER CONTEST (this time I’m being serious)******
- Tell me about an embarrassing moment from your childhood/youth
- I will pick the top five finalists and put them to a vote.
- One submission per person. (I have a feeling you guys might have a ton to choose from….)
- You have until next Monday, July 30th at 12:00 pm NOON EST to send me your story through my email shesamaineiac(at)yahoo(dot)com or post it in the comments below.
- Just remember, everyone will be reading it and laughing at you. That’s the best part of this contest!
- PLEASE keep it rated G. Okay, maybe rated PG…this is supposed to be a family-friendly blog…(ahem)
Just to show you I’m not afraid of spilling my most embarrassing moments, here’s a quick rundown of some of mine…just off the top of my head:
- In high school, I had a major crush on this really cute boy. One day, I walked slowly by him, trying to catch his eye, only to trip and fall down right in front of him. Guess my plan worked.
- I leaned back and fell off the top tier of the raised bleachers while singing in a Christmas concert in junior high. To this day, every time I hear Silent Night, I hyperventilate.
- When I was around 11, I was the proud owner of a super cool banana-seat bike with purple sparkly tassels on the handlebars and a baseball card in the spokes. I was showing off my new ride to a group of friends, so I pedaled hard to gain speed, looked back at them with a big grin on my face, then rode it straight into the back of a parked car.
- I once was so nervous before going onstage for a play, I…uh…let one rip. In front of a cute boy I really liked. Then I tried to blame it on him. This was last year.
- I was once on a long walk with my older brother, couldn’t make it back home to use the bathroom in time…so I…sorta, kinda…went to the bathroom anyway. Yep, in my pants. It wasn’t number one. I had to finish that walk, cars whizzing by, as I waddled back home, crying and trying desperately to look normal. (This wasn’t last year. Sheesh! I was only six years old, don’t judge.)
See? This isn’t a hard contest! I just banged out a bunch of really embarrassing gems and that was only the tip of the iceberg. If you have no embarrassing stories to share, you’re lying! And you’ll miss out on a super cool baseball hat. So spill it, people!
She’s a Maineiac contest ends 12:00 PM NOON EST July 30, 2012. She’s a Maineiac contest is not affiliated with L.L. Bean’s, lobsters, blueberries or The Simpsons. Void where prohibited. She’s a Maineiac wants to know what ‘void where prohibited’ means. If your embarrassing story is chosen as the winner, you must forward me your mailing address so all these lovely prizes can be shipped to you and you can be the envy of all your friends. Also, free free to shout it from the rooftops that She’s A Maineiac made your life complete.
↓Below is a handy-dandy little form you can fill out with your most humiliating story so no one here can read it. Unless you are chosen as a finalist. In that case, EVERYONE will be reading it.