Better Living Through Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups

Reese’s and Me: A Love Story

Life is a challenge from the moment we enter this world–we kick, we scream, we beg the doctor to put us back in. At times the world can be coldly cruel or breathtakingly beautiful. Over the years, we’ll all experience our share of soaring highs and devastating lows.

But in my life, one thing will never change. One thing will always be there for me when I need it. My constant. Something I took solace in while I weathered the inevitable dark storms of life–the skinned knees, broken hearts, wedding day jitters, surprise mother-in-law visits and killer pregnancy cravings (to name a few).

And, if there’s a God in heaven, it will be there for me as my last meal when I shuffle off this mortal coil.

Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups

It all began one clear chilly day in early September when I was born. I had spent the previous 40 weeks while in utero siphoning the chocolate peanut butter elixir from my mother as she indulged her intense sugar cravings by eating her weight in peanut butter cups.  As soon as I came out of the cozy confines of the womb, I was on a desperate hunt for the sweet stuff, only to be met with years of bland formula and strained peas. I knew deep in my heart I would taste that decadent treat again. I just needed a few teeth.

Once those molars broke free and trick or treat season rolled around, I was set. But with four older brothers to survive, my existence was nothing short of hell. It was a dog eat dog world, and I was wearing Reese’s peanut butter cup wrapper-lined diapers. Soon I realized my one true beacon of hope rested on the ability to hoard all of the Reese’s candy in a toy box underneath my pink canopy bed. My Barbies guarded my treasure with their lives.

However, my brothers were savvy; my stash was discovered (damn that G.I. Joe!) and my world almost ended that fateful day. Although my brothers were downright ruthless in their attempt to snatch that chocolately peanut buttery goodness out of my death grip, I never let it go.

Things were going along fine, then my mother had another baby. And, to my horror, it was yet another boy. At first I had a hard time warming up to my baby brother. Thankfully, my dad, being the wise man he was, suggested I think happy things when I held him. So I did. I closed my eyes tight and pretended to see the one thing I cherished most in life. It worked. I loved my brother with all of my tiny three year old heart. I just had to remember not to lick his face.

My mother said I was a bit hesitant to help her with his feedings. She eventually had to stoop to bribery. Oh, the magical times I had! Here I am holding my brother, shoveling one peanut butter cup into my mouth after another while he peacefully drank from his bottle.

As the years rolled by, I grew to love my Reese’s more and more each day. I discovered that a big bag of Reese’s Pieces could double as the sister I always wanted. Here we are at Christmas. I’d always wanted a sibling who loved me unconditionally and never wanted to throw my Barbies in the toilet or give me wedgies.

My lifelong relationship with Reese’s even survived the horror of the Bad Yearbook Photo from seventh grade. I was never more proud than the day I crafted my very own Reese’s ribbon barrettes. Granted, I was made fun of in the halls for months afterward, but I didn’t care. I still had my peanut butter cups. Life was good.

As I entered my twenties, I longed to share my life with someone. I had to find my soul mate. But who? Who could possibly garner my respect and admiration? Was there a man worthy? I prayed every night I would find a man who loved Reese’s peanut butter cups as much as I did.  Little did I know, but that man existed, and he was already living his own charmed life a mere town away, having spent most of his youth enjoying the 1970s pastime, Peanut Butter Cup Toss.

We met, we fell in love. We were as perfect for each other as chocolate and peanut butter.

On April 15, 2000, we had a wedding worthy of a royal couple. No expense was spared. About halfway through the reception, my custom-designed peanut butter cup dress started to melt, but it was oh, so worth the thousands of hours my bridesmaids spent hot gluing them on.

We went on to have two beautiful children. My son grew up to be an enigma: a boy who didn’t like chocolate.

But my daughter? Her fate was sealed the moment her birth certificate was official.

And now as I watch my daughter’s love for peanut butter cups grow, I take comfort in knowing the Reese’s love I had will be passed down from generation to generation. I can die a happy woman.

Now if you’ll excuse me, Easter is over and sitting in front of me is a 3 pound Reese’s peanut butter egg with my name on it.

Disclaimer: No cavities were formed in the writing of this post. Please act responsibly. Brush your teeth once in awhile. And for God’s sake, would it kill you to eat some broccoli. No one can live on candy alone.  Excessive use of Reese’s peanut butter cups can cause extreme mood swings, seizures, and a bad case of the glassy-eyes and twitchy-face. Use at your own risk.

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Reese’s Pieces

116 thoughts on “Better Living Through Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups

    1. I think my favorite has to be Jimmy’s peanut butter cup toss game. I laughed so hard at the one…that poor poor man! And he’s on Angie’s blog right now and crushing everyone in her contest! Because really, who can rock a hairdo better?

  1. ROTFLOL!! This was hysterical–and though I was to start a cleansing fast today, I may just have to go on a Reese’s binge first.Then I’ll have something to cleanse–just so I can repeat the cycle–right?

  2. This is EPIC!!! These pictures make my guilty pleasure heart sing. You have outdone yourself, Darla. I was already thinking before I started reading this, that you should win some sort of prize because you already vlogged about your love of PB cups many moons ago, and now I really think a prize is necessary. Maybe a life-sized model of Mr. Reese made out of chocolate and peanut butter?

    And this totally reminded me – my wedding favor was Reese’s PB cups!! I got this fancy edible stencil stuff and stenciled a fancy pink “D” (for my new last name – and our wedding colors were pink and brown) on over 200 PB cups and wrapped ’em up all pretty-like. Dang. I can’t believe I didn’t think to include a picture of that in my post!!

    1. Thanks, Jules and you’re right. I SHOULD win a prize for talking about pb cups so much that my husband wants a divorce now. Or at least a legal separation from Reese’s. Ain’t gonna happen, I’m afraid.

      I have to see this picture of your wedding favors!

  3. Running from Hell with El

    OMG, you are such a freakin’ brilliant writer. You slay me. This is inspired my friend. I am going to go share this in Hell; hope some of my peeps head your way.

  4. This post was a long, long time in coming my friend, but it was worth the wait. I’m verklempt here. Seeing preteen Darla with her snazzy barrettes, and preteen Jimmy with his groovy toss-a-cup ways – it’s obvious this was a match made in heaven. sniff, sniff,

    whoot woo- hoo! We actually did it!!!!

    1. I can’t believe you pulled this off, O’ Goddess of WordPress! Please, do me a favor and treat yourself this week. (after your taxes are done) I’m thinking a nice Reese’s Martini this Friday night might hit the spot.

  5. This is mental…and hilarious, I thought it some sheer coincidence you’re all writing about these things. They are just being marketed over here right now, I guess I should try them, though I disliked Hersheys kisses someone bought me back from LA, and I have yet to try an Oreo.

    1. Just being marketed over there right now?! What kind of world do we live in?! You guess you should try them? Oh, Joe, Joe, Joe. And you’ve never had an Oreo. I cannot believe I am reading this. You have not lived.

      1. How many years will eating them take off my life?

        I’ve never had a sweet tooth to be fair, but it is odd they are just coming over here now, must be in exchange for terrorists we are about extradite to you guys. Obama agreed to take our Islamist extremists off our hands if we placed a bulk order for peanut butter cups

      2. Seems a fair deal.

        And how many years will they take off your life?! They only add to it. And they go well with wine. Chocolate wine, but you’ve had that before, right? Or are you that sheltered?

  6. This is my favorite, favorite post of yours. Were I the man-behind-the-curtain (or woman, no bias intended), I would knight you (or queen you?) with a Freshly Pressed crown of glory. Again. It’s that awesome.

    1. Thank you, Stacie. I did slave away many, many hours with my crappy windows Paint software. I would have to say if this is Freshly Pressed I would be riding a high much higher than any Reese’s sugar high. Also, my husband would KILL me. He’s already plastered all over Childhood Relived’s blog in his Toss Across glory.

    1. It is a truly magical life. I’m hoping Julia Roberts could play me, we both share the giant mutant toothy smile. Oh, and my husband could be played by Brad Pitt. No, George Clooney! No, no….Ryan Gosling. Yeah. Ryan….Huh? what were you saying again?

      1. bigsheepcommunications

        To be fair, you’re just going to have to have them all audition for you. We expect a very thorough blog post on the, uh, casting process.

  7. You ladies are on a roll…how about serving up some “Rolo’s”, then oreos, and my all time favorite, Baby Ruth? Encore! Well done. Did Peg loan you her markers? She does like to play nice. Whew, now I’d better get off to work…and if I get there late…I’ll just have to explain, “you see I stopped for one RPBC, and then another, and then another for breakfast.”

  8. Darla, those pictures are miraculous. 🙂 Right away I knew you’d outdone yourself with the chocolate smudges on your face and pajamas! And then, when you covered over your brother’s face with a Peanut Butter Cup? Loved it!! Made me laugh out loud. I had no idea that Reese’s were so instrumental into making you the fine woman you are today. And your wedding dress? It positively glittered in golden Reese’s beauty. I was married in 2000 as well, and my dress paled in comparison to yours. If I ever renew my vows, you’ll have to teach me the hot glue tricks.

    1. Melissa, I’ve learned from the Master Pegolicious, Queen of Painting Pictures. You really can’t go wrong with a Reese’s belt buckle or ribbon barrettes. I’d buy them if they made them. Of course, my fashion sense is already pretty bad….

      That hot glued dress was a nightmare! The bridesmaids kept nibbling off of it. (shakes head)

  9. Hahaha…
    I’ve got this mental image of Tim Gunn responding to the ture spledor that is your wedding dress…
    *he removes his glasses and wipes away a tear before bursting into applause*
    ‘Oh how you’ve made it work, She’s a Maineiac… Oh how you’ve made it work!’
    🙂

    1. It was a blast trying to come up with ridiculous things for my photos. Although the wedding one didn’t need any help, that was my actual reception, right down to the flowing Reese’s tiara/veil.

  10. Love the pics!!
    Well there is no greater way to show your devotion than naming your child after the object of your affection.
    And, that pic of you feeing your brother the bottle – that baby is amost as big as you are!

    1. Aw, thanks, Amy! Truth be told (and my blog is all about telling the truth) she was named after my late father. I suppose it was fate we both love Reese’s pb cups though.

      That photo of me feeding my younger brother is one of my favorites. I was pretty tiny, you’re right. Or maybe it’s just because my brother has a giant head.

  11. Can I borrow those Reese’s barretts? Classic! And I am simply devasted about your Wedding dress – I have heard a lot of wedding dress horror stories, but that one is truly tragic!

    So funny – and a great idea, will check out those other posts 🙂

  12. You killed me. I’m still recovering from my Easter candy hangover. And what did the Easter Bunny bring this year? Yup, all Reeses treats in a variety of forms. Little Man was so excited that the Easter Bunny finally remembered that he doesn’t like jelly beans, and didn’t bring him any. My Little Man is a Reeses kiddo.

    Love the striped pants! I think I had a pair much like those, back in the 70’s. Wonderfully creative. And your wedding dress is to die for- talk about bling! Thanks for the laugh.

    1. Oh, yeah, jelly beans? Pbssst. Gross. Yuck, phooey, phooey! Your little man is a smart one.

      What’s sad about my husband’s pants is they were much worse BEFORE I added the Reese’s fashion touches. Truly just awful. Well, you can guess by the looks of his shirt what they originally looked like.

    1. Well, now that I know that about you, welcome, welcome, welcome! Pull up a chair, sit a spell. I’m sure we’ll get along just fine. Can I get you a drink? Some of my giant 3 pound Reese’s egg perhaps? (It’s only half gone…oops, I’m sorry, it’s all gone now)

      1. My sister actually designed her grad dress out of old toothpaste boxes (not the tubes– that would have been gross). She cut the boxes up into diamond shapes and layered them to create a sort of tassle effect. Sounds kind of nasty, but it was actually GORGEOUS. 🙂

  13. I am laughing so hard my stomach hurts. No, wait. It’s just….my pants are too tight….this has got to be the most fattening event on WP ever!! You are just freakin’ brilliant. If I didn’t love you so much I’d hafta hate ya.

    Reese’s Peanut Butter cups: 2.25 for 2 at rip-off convenience store
    Dental appointment to fill cavities: $648.00.
    Darla’s pictures….PRICELESS.

  14. This was hilarious. I think you can be the offficial CO-conspirator — leaving me officially in the Dust.

    But you know, I think I had that dress, too. The 7th grade one. No Reese’s in my hair though. In mine it would have been egg.

  15. You are too funny! Reese’s should sponsor your blog and all of those pics should end up on the wrapper. I’m especially digging that television set in the first one with the oval braid rug. Was this taken in my living room?

    1. I agree, Reese’s should use my pictures on their wrappers, why, the peanut butter cups would sell like hotcakes then. I’d be forever humiliated, but I’d be rich and that’s all that matters.

      We had a braided rug in every room. But you can’t beat the orange shag carpet in my husband’s photo.

  16. Holy peanut butter burps. This was hilarious, Darla! You knocked it out of the park, man! The pictures, the Reese’s ribbon barrettes. Everything! And Jimmy playing that weird game again? It’s like I died and went to nostalgia heaven.

    1. I know, I laughed when you put up Jimmy’s Toss Across pic in your contest the same week I revealed to hundreds of blog followers that he had a Reese’s belt buckle and striped pants. I don’t know if my husband will speak to me now, but it’s our wedding anniversary this Sunday so he’d better get over it and buy me some flowers or something.

      1. Oh, yeah! But I’d have nothing else in life to live for if he did those things. We do plan on going out to a movie and dinner withOUT the kids. We are wild and crazy like that, always livin’ on the edge.

  17. LOVED it as usual 🙂 I have to tell you I really only like the Easter Reese Eggs, because there is more yummy peanuty goodness in those. So why is everyone posting about Reese Peanut Butter Cups? Ok, I’m off to check some more Reeses posts and maybe steel a few from the kids Easter stash 😉

    1. Oh, I totally agree. The eggs are by FAR the better ones.

      A few months ago, Peg (of Peg-o-leg’s Ramblings) and I were discussing the cups versus the eggs at length and she had the brilliant idea of us both writing a post about our Reese’s love. Then she realized the Freshly Pressed page had 19 spots, so she thought it would be hilarious to get 19 bloggers to write about the same thing at the same time to get some WordPress attention. She is a brilliant mastermind, that Peg. It was fun just to have everyone wonder what the hell was going on.

  18. I know I’m a day late and a dollar short on your Reese’s Piece, but unlike some of the gluttons I see around me, I prefer to ration my candy intake over the span of a few days, rather than gobbling it all down in a matter of minutes. (You can take a moment to glance over at your basket, with nothing left in it but black jelly beans and that hideous green plastic grass spilling out onto the carpet)

    Reading about your lifelong Peanut Butter Cup intake, I had to wonder if Reese’s may soon cease to exist. Is there a chance that the19 blogs will someday soon be a sad bit of nostalgia? I realize this sounds blasphemous, but the amount of peanut allergy phobia in schools these days is threatening the existence of anything even remotely related to the peanut. Will it be long before homeowners, frightened by litigation, will stop giving out any candy containing peanuts on Halloween? Easter egg hunt organizers, already suffering from over-zealous helicopter parents ruining the hunts by making them into Olympic events, will have to scrap putting candy in eggs and just include cheap, lead-painted trinkets from China.

    “Peanuts!”, we’ll say, our eyes glazing over as we talk with our great-grandchildren, “I recall when they had these wondrous things called Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups…”

    The great grands will roll their eyes, and wriggle uncomfortably on our laps in hopes of escape, as we launch into another old-timey story about the way the world used to be. We’d regale them with stories of television sets with rabbit ears and tube screens, cars that couldn’t fly, something called a “record album” and candy with peanuts in it.

    Enjoyed your post, as usual.

    Now then, perhaps another sliver of peanut butter egg for my mid-morning snack.

    1. At first I was a bit scared just imagining a world without peanut butter cups. But after last weekend, where I ate half a bag of the Reese’s eggs when my kids weren’t looking…then I scarfed down a giant egg my husband bought me, then I spent the better part of Wednesday reading about them on everyone’s blogs….I think I’m done with them. Yep. Blech. Who needs ’em?

      But I saw that you had a cool idea to write a post all about tequila over at G.G’s blog and I am totally with you on that.

      1. I’ve got a problem with tequila…no, not like that…it’s that sometimes i crave the cheap stuff, which mixes well with bitter lemon or limeade for a lazy man’s margarita, but other times i need the good stuff…the estate bottled sip and savor types…either one ends up making me loopy, but my original intentions are very different at the outset…maybe this requires further discussion after all…

      2. I’m sure Greatsby would know more about the finer points of mixing drinks than me. What with wearing that smoking jacket all day with a drink in his hand. Although I think in one picture he’s holding a glass of milk.

        Me? Simple–a buzz off a beer or half a glass of wine. Anything more and I’m paying for it the next day. I haven’t had tequila in ages. I’d probably end up on some bar dancing like Pee Wee Herman.

  19. Darla, I’ve missed you! Glad to see from the photos you’ve been eating well. Please forgive my blog absence. I’m immersed in a project that leaves no time for pleasure. Am looking forward to the end so I can return to my blog browsing days. Till then, keep up the great work (and know that I’m dreaming of RPBC!) Your bloggy friend, Christy (Dishy)

    1. And just where have you been, missy? Oh, out having an actual life, you say? Yeah, I need me one of them. I certainly will look forward to your return, I’ve missed you, too. The kids are on school vacation starting tomorrow so I’m afraid my blogging days will be on hold for at least a week. I think I need a good break though.

    1. What I can’t get past are those curtains with the wacky migraine-inspired blue diamonds. I think my mom had those up for at least a decade. No wonder my taste in decor is so horrible now.

      1. cooper

        i’m going to have to dig out the photo…i think i could give you a good run for your money in the horrible curtain department….

    1. Congratulations, Pegoleg!!!
      You are my 100th comment!

      You have won one mighty fine, snazzy as all get-out, lightning-zapping, sexy-as-hell, smokin’hot jacket! (if you want it back, that is…if not, I’ll keep it. But I feel bad for taking it after you sent me that sad, sad picture of you saying a tearful goodbye)

  20. My husband is halfway through the Easter time Reese’s egg. Of course his mom got it for him, which he repaid her with an extra long hug and 2 kisses on the cheeks. He clapped his hands rapidly and scampered into another room clutching the box in his arms. The man is 47 years old.

    Sorry, I eat the organic versions of peanut butter cups now. I did however trade Halloween candy from my pumpkin for others’ Reese cups back in the day. I also swallowed the much smaller versions of the Easter eggs in front of my mom. There was no time to say thank you or give a kiss or hug cause I had to eat the egg before a breath could be taken, ha.

  21. Good morning, Darla, I’m just dropping in
    To say Happy Anniversary to both you and Jim.
    From the pictures you’ve posted it’s plain to see.
    You were made for each other – ’twas sure meant to be.

    I wish you happiness, may your life be complete
    May your love grow stronger – each year get more sweet.
    When times get tough – may you lift each other up
    And work together – like a perfect peanut butter cup.

    1. Oh! Thank you! I am rushing off to buy a card for Jim right now and I’ll be sure to put your poem in there. Maybe this time he won’t even want to throw it out? Or maybe he’ll actually READ it for once?

  22. Happy Anniversary!!! Now excuse me, while you’re buying that card, I’m off to buy stock in the Reese’s company. I have a feeling it wil continue to increase as your create more Reese’s lovers.

  23. When I was 15 I got my first job and had some disposable income for the first time in my life. Across the street from our house was a little corner market owned by a very sweet Korean couple. They got rich and I got fat. On what? You guessed it–Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups. Yummm.

    1. One of my earlier jobs was at Fanny Farmer candy store when I was around 22. The manager told me it was company policy to have their employees sample all of the candy from time to time so we could tell the customers more about it. Yeah, I gained 15 pounds in the first year. But it was my best job ever.

  24. How did I miss this post? Oh yeah…I remember. I was running a carnival for 600 kids. Catching up…

    That was brilliant! If I had done this post, I would have not done anything else for several days straight. So meticulous, artistic, crafty. How did your laundry get done? Kids fed? Did you fall asleep with RPBC’s in your mouth, drooling chocolaty goodness all over your keyboard? I loved the tic-tac-toe with RPBC’s. That sent me into a fit of laughter. (I still think Angie’s contest was rigged. Must’ve been jacket jealousy.)

    1. Oh, drat. I’m reading comments and it appears I missed your and Jim’s anniversary. *pst chk* That’s the sound of my first can of beer for the evening. I drink in your honor and wish you many, many more crazy years together, my dear.

    2. Well, if there’s any excuse for missing out on this huge pb cup coup, it’s running a carnival for 600 kids.

      This post was fun to do, I had the pictures done within minutes. Really, you can tell with my shoddy artwork. But I have to admit the peanut butter Toss Across was my favorite. How can you go wrong with a picture of Timmy from HR Puffinstuff? And yes, Angie’s contest was a bitter taste of defeat for my husband. I mean, to expose his Davy Jones haircut and butterfly collar and NOT win? So sad.

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