10) Clothing: optional.
9) Silverware, plates and table: optional
8) Food of any nutritional value: optional.
7) If he was asked: “Hey, Dad, is it okay if we fill these water balloons with whipped cream and chocolate syrup and throw them out the window at Mom weeding the garden?” OR “Hey, Dad? Is it okay if we stack all of the pillows and couch cushions in the entire house onto our sleds then slide down the stairs wearing underwear on our heads and shooting water guns filled with Kool-aid?” OR “Hey, Dad? Is it okay if we put on every single item of clothing we own, then roll ourselves down the muddy, grassy hill in the yard while shooting water guns filled with ketchup?” He would most likely answer with: “Sure.”
6) Ignores crushing chest pain and/or accidental kicks to the family jewels in order to continue the World Wrestling Federation/Tickle Monster/Let’s See If We Can Slowly and Painfully Kill Dad marathon.
5) Thinks a strawberry frosted donut is a perfectly acceptable breakfast.
4) Once dressed up as Darth Vader in public and it wasn’t Halloween.
3) Plays Mario Kart Wii, knows all the secret shortcuts, and thinks Bowzer is a real poophead.
2) Thinks Justin Bieber sucks, Alvin and the Chipmunks rock, and wearing a pink frilly apron while baking princess cupcakes is super kewl.
and the number one reason Dad rules…
1) Well, Duh. He’s Dad, nuff said.
(also loves to say things like, duh and nuff said)
Happy Father’s Day!