(…because hate is such a strong word.)
11) If I don’t blog, I die a little inside. Then I curse myself for being addicted. And I die inside a little more. Then I write a post about blogging. Then I cry in my beer. Repeat ad nauseam. Then I look up the phrase ‘ad nauseam’ to make sure I’m using it correctly or if I spelled it wrong. Then I realize it’s probably spelt not spelled. Like whilst or learnt…? But isn’t spelt some kind of bread my mom eats that has the texture of cardboard? Then my head implodes.
10) When blogging cuts into my sleep time. Also my housework time. But never my eating time because, let’s face it, food is necessary to keep our energy up so we can blog some more.
9) When you leave a comment you think is clever and original, only to realize you just said the exact same thing as the person about 20 comments up. But yours is riddled with typos.
8) When you publish a post you’ve worked on for days and it gets tons of hits and comments–then after awhile you look back and realize you wrote their instead of they’re….you’re instead of your, spelled weird, wierd and left out the last paragraph.
7) No spell check on your comments. No ability to edit your comments. Or delete them entirely because you’ve realized when you typed it out the previous night, you were drunk and had apparently lost your ability to spell or form complete sentences or make any sense at all and so you ended up just rambling on and on and look like the world’s biggest idiot kinda like what I’m doing right now. [I’m not really drunk right now, the idiot thing comes naturally for me]
6) You want to leave a comment, but the pressure to be witty or sound halfway sane is too much, so you panic and type: Haha! Good post! i really loved the part where you said the funny thing and then the other part where you said the other thing! you so funny! I love you! But not in a stalkerish kinda way! I swear!
5) Whenever I hit the ‘publish’ button, a mixture of shiny quarters and Skittles doesn’t come cascading out of my computer monitor like a slot machine.
4) You spend hours crafting a post, writing several drafts. You think it’s the greatest thing since beer can hats. So you hold your breath and publish it–this deeply personal creation…this piece of writing you’ve slaved over with your blood, sweat and tears, putting your heart and soul out there–and no one reads it or comments on it. All you get are crickets. Sometimes even the crickets desert you. But the super short post you wrote while you were half asleep, sitting on the toilet? Yeah, that’s the one that gets the most hits. Because you used ‘Justin Bieber’ as a tag.
3) You get set to publish a post about something so specific and random, so incredibly bizarre, you know it’s original (like a story about eating Skittles while wearing a gorilla suit and rollerskating), only to see another blogger had just posted about the same subject hours before. And theirs was Freshly Pressed.
2) There will always be a blogger out there that’s smarter, funnier, and infinitely more popular. Sure, I have 700+ followers. And that makes me think my little blog is getting bigger (and I know, I know… I am very blessed to have them all because during my first six months of blogging I had exactly two followers. I am eternally grateful for every last one of you guys. Never leave me, ever!) But it took two solid years of cranking out crap to get to this point. And yesterday I was waiting in line at Walmart behind roughly the same amount of people. Also, Danny Bonaduce has 10,000 twitter followers. Kinda puts things in perspective.
and the number one thing about blogging I’m not very fond of….
1) Whenever I corner a relative at a get-together because I want to tell them all about my blog, they politely hand me their drink, turn, then jump out a window.
What things about blogging do you hate (aren’t fond of)? Or is it all just unicorns and rainbows and Skittles with you? If so, can you throw some my way? Does my blog make my butt look big? What? Well, who asked you!
images: invisibleassistant, wikipedia
She's A Maineiac 
Me too, Darla. Especially #5. For me, #1 results in the person going to get a hand trowel — I think because he’s inspired by my posts — and he starts whacking himself on the head with it. Multiple times. It should my cue to shut it, but I just keep on going! ‘Cause we bloggers are like that. 🙂
Shannon, my older brother is visiting from Oregon. I am always trying to impress him so I kept walking over to him during a family BBQ to talk about my blog and he’d walk away, or talk over me…or look off into the distance. No eye contact. Finally, I actually got out my laptop and walked over to him and shoved it in his face to show him my blog. Yeah, not my finest moment. That’s the funny thing about blogging: if you don’t blog, you don’t give a crap
Maybe he thought you were saying “iBlog,” you know, and he’s just not tech-savvy. Then when you brought him one (your computer, he thinks it’s one of these new iBlogs), he’s all like, “Oh Jeezum H Crow! I hope she doesn’t make me type on it!! I better get outta here…”
So easy to make that mistake.
Well, my guess is he was muttering a few more choice words than Jeezum crow under his breath
It’s also easy to make the mistake that you think anybody out there in this world gives a hoot about your blog. When I tell most people they change the subject and avert their eyes. I may as well tell people I once did time in prison, I’d get a better reaction.
Oh man, so many of those things above. You know all the funny stuff. And that other stuff. Really good stuff there. Me likey. 😉
You have 700 followers? Damn. I guess that’s what Freshly Pressing does for a blog. I have . . . much much less. What do I dislike about blogging? That wordpress apparently doesn’t know I exist! What? You asked. I feel like I have had some really excellent posts (and some stinkers, true) and just wish someone out there would recognize it. I’m at that point. I’ve been at it for a year. I feel there should be a next step or something, right?
The other thing is when you see these newbies (damn whipersnappers!), start their blogs about a month ago, and they are already listed on The Bloggess’ site and have a thousand followers and have ads on their site that they are making money off of and by the time you read their post, there are like 350 comments already. Yeah, that burns my britches a little. How do they get so damn popular so fast (being on Jenny’s site helps, no doubt)? I mean, they are funny and likable and all that, but . . . what about me? Yep, I said it. Pity party, table for one, right over here. <—–
(By the way . . . don't think I didn't notice that you tagged this post with Justin Bieber, you sly thing you). 😉
That’s exactly it, Misty. I had roughly 100 followers after one year. I was shocked I even had that many! Then I had about 300 a mere two months ago. So almost 2 years to get to that point. FP helps a ton and I’ve been lucky there. And yeah, we all know we aren’t supposed to care about the numbers, it’s quality not quantity. But we all do care, don’t we? It’s only being human, we want people to read our stuff or what’s the point of having a blog. I hear ya, I really do. I was thinking of The Bloggess when I wrote this post actually. None of us will ever be in her stratosphere.
Don’t know if this helps because I have the same frustration (and you might already know this), but I watched a vlog of The Bloggess’s on how to make money on your blog, and that long list of blogs on the one side of her blog are actually paid ‘ads’ – she cuts a deal to bloggers for that, though!
Oh, I so know where you are coming from–you have been in the blogging business for a year longer than I–but every one of your observations is so true to life! I write something philosophically sound and get a few likes, I write about my cat and I get all kinds of hits.
I spelled ad nauseam wrong forever and per say until a friend corrected me and told me it was per se (and I am supposed to be educated!). Where is the spell check on our comments –is someone just trying to make us look stupid?.
You are one of the first bloggers I followed and I love your writing – and no this blog does not make your butt look big–does it make my bat wings flop in the wind?
Anyway – loved this post – you are wise and wonderful and funny.
Yes, I make mistakes like that all the time! I know the grammar police are out there so I try my hardest to write well (not ‘good’, right??) It’s all too much pressure sometimes. I can barely form a complete sentence most days. I’m getting old, my kids have taken the last brain cells I have left.
And no, your blog doesn’t make your bat wings flop. haha!!
Darla, to me, you can build power plants out of ants and sand.
~d.
D–you made my day (maybe I should make that my new tagline to attract new followers?)
What?…the “D-you made my day” or …Oh that! 😉 Well under two conditions 1.) Give me full credit and by “me” I of course mean my smarty pants brother-in-law and… 2.) Send me money.
I’m just joking of course but send me any coins that start shooting out of your computer…or Skittles.
Seriously, knock yourself out. 🙂 I think it would be funny….but not if you for reeelzz knock yourself out. Just use it already if you want to.
{I spent too long in the tractor today driving around in circles. Ugh, I need a Gin & Tonic!}
~d.
Just be sure never to mix your G&Ts with your tractor doughnuts. That could be a disaster waiting to happen.
Point well taken but since I sit on my butt enough already the real disaster would be eating doughnuts in the first place. Mmmm…”Tractor doughnuts”…maybe one wouldn’t hurt…
Love that you tagged this with Justin Bieber!!! LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!! Grandly funny.
You don’t get a cascade of shiny quarters and Skittles when you publish? I am shocked!
I was hoping people would catch my shameless use of Bieber. This should be my most viewed post ever!
So what do you get when you hit publish? Please don’t tell me crisp 100 dollar bills and an endless river of chocolate…
Of course the 100 dollar bills are crisp; otherwise they would get stuck and wouldn’t make it out my computer. No chocolate though. Total bummer.
I’m glad you are back from vacation and blogging again. You may not be fond of every aspect of blogging but your followers are delighted that you do blog. Your posts are always very entertaining.
Thank you! I am thrilled to be back blogging again. Relieved, actually. All this stuff in my head rattling around an just itching to come out. After 3 weeks, my husband was begging me to get back on here. “hey, uh…honey? So when are you blogging again? You should REALLY blog about this and not tell me..”
It sounds like blogging is saving you lots of money on marriage therapy.
You’ve got that straight! And money for Advil for my husband’s pounding headaches from listening to me blab.
HAHAHAHAHA! “And then my head implodes” 🙂 I don’t even have a blog yet and I get that look when I’m raving about Peg or your blog. Sigh…
With this ungodly heat, I’m hoping we don’t get a ‘brown-out’ and lose power. It looks so pretty outside, but I almost melted when I opened the door. Enjoy your pool! (or is it boiling from the sun beating on it)?
And, no, your blog does NOT make your thighs look big. Not to worry.
I can’t wait until you are cranking out posts and your head is imploding. I’ll be there to help you clean up the mess.
The pool is doing great. I’ve actually jumped in it almost every single day this week fully clothed. I’m not kidding. My kids think I’m the greatest thing since Super Mario Bros. vitamins. (besides, the world isn’t ready for this jelly, no swimsuit for this chick)
I couldn’t help but notice you said my thighs don’t look big, but you’ve carefully sidestepped the issue that is my gigantic butt. Which you will see a gread deal of in my video this weekend. Don’t miss it, it’s pretty bad!
The inability for people to get sarcasm!!
Don’t tell anyone I said this, but sometimes, the written word is so bland…
Loved the post!! They’re all so true ^-^
yes! Thank you! That is a GOOD one!
I can’t tell you how many times I’ve posted something that is obviously full of sarcasm…tongue-in-cheek humor…and I get comments from people that actually take what I’ve said seriously. If they ever read my posts they would know that I rarely take myself seriously, so they definitely shouldn’t. Lighten up a little people, sheesh. (looks like you’ve touched a nerve here with me…haha!)
Hahaha it’s so incredibly true, though!!! It’s happened to me too many times!!
Awesome post, blah, blah, blah …
Here, grab a skittle and rainbow, on me.
No, your (or should I say you’re) butt doesn’t look big, but what’s up with that giant plaid coffee cup????
Sorry, I’m having that “this is a totally lame comment” feeling write now, so I’d better jump off this, before I jump out a window.
Please validate me, by saying this comment was REALLY funny, or I might obsess about this all day.
You didn’t disappoint me, MJ. No need to obsess. You are always funny. Me? I’m getting better at the lame comments. I usually don’t catch up on blogs in my reader until well past my bedtime and by then the Nyquil’s kicked in.
You and that giant coffee mug! (from a rival of L.L. Bean’s that shall remain nameless…) *shaking head*
I totally agree wholeheartedly! Here hold my drink…..
The same thing has happened to me when I have sweated over a post for days and got fewer views and comments than one I whipped out!
I gotta ask you, is it me or are a lot of people on vacation???
Also WP did something to eliminate a lot of the views on the home page. I used to get the same total or more than my post! Now if I get 10% of my views, I am thrilled. I am sure they just got rid of the inflated views, but I loved the inflation!
Off to buy some Skittles and open a window. Kidding! 🙂
Haha! Your first line made me laugh out loud for realz (are kids saying ‘realz’ now?)
Yes, people have left the blog world in droves this summer. No one is around anymore. It feels like the summer when I was 10 and playing alone outside on the lawn, talking to my Barbies because my brothers had all deserted me to go off to Boy Scout camp.
I didn’t notice the views dropping because my views plummeted as soon as I went on my bloggy break.
Well Darla, let me just say in a non-stalking way, that there are 0 things about your blog that I am not fond of. I click on you as soon as I see you’ve posted, unless of course I don’t.
Me? What am I not fond of? When I feel like I should have something to say, but really don’t. Or when I keep posting on politics and think I should go somewhere else for a day. Or when I realize that I didn’t convey what I meant to say effectively enough so that any of the comments pertain to what I actually meant to say.
Oops. I almost did 11 myself (Good Job keeping Letterman from suing you, BTW).
You always convey yourself well. Brilliantly. And I am always interested in what you have to say. Y’know this might be a good time to confess something to you: I love reading your posts about politics. I tend to agree with everything you say, but I don’t have the knowledge to leave a halfway intelligent comment. I do like to click ‘like’ and then say, “Yeah! I agree, Elyse!” But you always have such interesting debates on there, I just like to sit back and watch from a safe distance. I guess I’m too afraid from all the nasty arguments I’ve gotten into with my own in-laws.
Aw shucks, Darla. Originally I thought I would be doing a political blog. But it is hard to keep blogging and keep up on all the stuff you need to know to blog about politics. All I know is because I read the liberal blogs, where the real news comes out these days. Check out http://www.dailykos.com in particular… Your in-laws will hate you for it, though!
[rubbing my hands together in a wickedly evil way]
Ooh! Well, in that case I’m gonna click on over there pronto!
Perfect post for me today! I’ve been at it 3 months. It was just a whim, kind of like a journal I started years ago. It would get misplaced, and turn up every year or so. My kids are left with intense views of their childhood, but only in one week snippets. I started blogging, can’t lose it and more likely to keep up. Then, I realized how many people were out there- kind of shocked still. I’m torn; I’m feeling like I MUST post something worthy every X days (or hours). I try not to look at the number of views, or followers. It’s such a wonderful feeling just to write a post that I like, for me. Truth is, that those likes,follows and comments are like crack. Sigh.
I know I’ve only been at this for 2 years, but I can say this to you with confidence–keep doing what gives you that wonderful feeling. You can’t go wrong. Write a post that you like, I think that’s the key. If you stay true to yourself, find your original voice, you’ll be good to go. I know that from experience. I used to write posts that only I was reading! For months and months. Crickets. Then eventually people showed up. But it was a long haul. Soooo worth it though. I’ve met so many incredible people all over the world through my blog. (and yes those stats are like crack!)
Hey – I saw what you did there….feeding my habit like that! 😉
(Thanks!)
it’s working though, isn’t it? C’mon….Y’know you wanna…keep blogging….it’ll be good for you…just do it….
I hate that I’m a blog addict!
I know, I hear you. Although I can’t imagine not being a blogger now…sigh…
When you come to the family reunion, I promise not to hand you my drink and jump out the window! As a matter of fact, I want to hear more! I love that you agonize over spelling/grammar. Perhaps you should come work with me . . . it is my job to worry about spelling/grammar. And other things that you may not know about such as word ladders and letting. (There is a word ladder in this comment, by the way, and I am trying not to care. I’m hoping that when I post it, the spacing shifts and takes care of it.) =)
Please get me a job with you, Kim! Pretty please! I can’t find a job here to save my life. I’m looking at working at McDonald’s because I might get free Big Macs as a perk!
And word ladders? what the? Yeah, I guess there are some things I’m better off not knowing. My poor little brain would short circuit.
When is this reunion again? Danny of course will be there. I’d love to go if I can figure out a way to get down there…
Why on earth would I leave a comment, when you’ve clearly pointed out comments stand to be the death of bloggers w/typos, repeated sentiments, typos, redundancy, etc.?!
Yesterday I told Kim I had my highest number of hits on Sunday. 405. I’ve been blogging for over 2yrs and I just reached 405 in one day. I was thrilled. And yesterday and today, I’m back to the normal 50 – 100. I’m still waiting for the day I am Freshly Pressed. Maybe I should have you be a guest blogger – that might do the trick.
Oh, no you can leave a comment, Lenore. Yours always make sense. I was talking about myself…I have a hard time leaving comments. It really takes all the brainpower out of me. I have to use the dictionary a lot.
That is awesome you had over 400 hits! I get about 150 the days that I post something. Days I don’t post it drops to about less than zero. With Freshly Pressed of course it goes through the roof, but then…it plummets back down the very next day. It’s fleeting. A fantastic fleeting moment, of course! but it’s a rollercoaster that drops you out at the end. It’s like all these strangers show up at your house, drink all of your booze, eat all your potato chips, then leave you with this huge mess of toiletpaper covered trees in the front yard.
Excellent visual, Darla. Love it!
When it happens to your house, I’ll come over and help you clean up, Lenore.
My new goal in life is to get Freshly Pressed.
I feel like I’m tap dancing while spinning plates while singing Surrey with a Fringe on Top, but nobody at WP is noticing. Come on WP!
Right there with you, girl. What’s up WP? Hey you! Look over here!! Please???? Sigh.
FP is the thing everyone wants, of course. It’s a mystery sometimes why a person gets FP. The right post and getting noticed at the right time. When it’s happened to me, it was for something I didn’t think in a million years would be noticed. So maybe that’s the key, don’t try at all. Kinda like what they told me when we were trying to get pregnant. Just stop trying so much. Pay no attention to it. And, it worked.
Now why on earth would they not want to look at that? I would PAY to see that, Jackie!
“KInda like what they told me when we were trying to get pregnant”? Okay, would that be the time we were REALLY trying, with calendars, thermometers, Robitussin and baking soda? Or the other times, with margaritas, or gin-n-tonics, or that New Years Eve champagne???
Robitussin and baking soda? Dammit! I knew my husband and I were doing it all wrong all that time!!
There is not one damn thing I don’t like about YOUR blog, that’s for sure!
Thanks, Margaret! (I’ll send you the check overnight express.)
Amen Sister! I am soooo definitely in agreement with you about writing dumb things in comments. Whenever I do that, I make sure it’s in the posts of talented, widely followed bloggers, so that I can expose my idiocy to the most people who have the best taste. Case in point, this morning’s blog by Byronic and my comment therein. I’m such a dolt.
I don’t think I’ve seen any comment you’ve ever written that wasn’t funny. Are you kidding me? Yours are the best. Me? I tend to panic a little. The bigger the blogger, the more flopsweat. I used to comment on japecake’s blog a lot but always ended up just typing out these super short comments like: Ha! Good stuff! and he was always so gracious about not pointing out that I am an idiot.
my comment on Byronic’s blog today made fun of the late Sage Stallone’s middle name. I was certain I offended someone (although, in retrospect, I suppose that Sly’s fan base isn’t too well represented in WordPress). Still, the politically correct take a dim view of poking fun at the deceased before enough months have passed.
By the way, I could identify with every single point you made in your excellent blog post today!!!
Ha! I’ll have to go on over to check it out. I’m sure it’s great. Hell, I’ve never seen a problem with making fun of things like that, but you’re right…it’s hard when you don’t want to offend anyone. I’ve done that countless times on Paul’s blog. I’ll write a comment, something really out there or just some dumb observation. But then I remember, Paul has a pretty dark sense of humor so I know I didn’t offend anyone. Maybe my grammar offends other readers over there, but ah, well, what the hell, screw it.
What the ??? I refreshed this page to see additional comments and your whole page changed before my eyes! New picture, and no picture of you and coffee mug. Hmmmm did MJ make you do that? Just asking….
Nope, for once MJ is not responsible. I am trying out a new theme. New header. But now I can’t figure out for the life of me how I can get rid of the infernal ‘infinite blog scroll’ whoozeewhazzit without having to put a widget in my footer! Grr! Might have to change my blog back to its original theme. Not sure I’m liking the new decor here now…
This is a very refreshing blog post! All of it I can definitely relate to. But I think the high points for me is #4 (because I always have it in my mind that someone, somewhere really wants a good post to read but then the stats show otherwise – whan whan) and #2 I often feel this way about your blog. You have a lot of funny stuff, a good following and now a Freshly Pressed. I have even entertained some of the ideas on how to bring more traffic to my blog but in the end I would get frustrated because of any one of the above 11 things! And I love #1 because I started my blog as a way to communicate with family and none of them ever read it. ha ha ha ha. I guess, in the end, you just have to do it for you. Thanks for writing this one!!
It always puzzles me which posts people respond to and which get no love at all. It’s been like that for me since day one. It reminds me of the jokes I tell to my family and friends. Some jokes fall flat, but other times, when I’m not even trying hard to be funny, people bust up laughing. Or maybe they’re just laughing at me and not at the joke…hm….
I hear you on wanting more traffic, we all want that, all the time. It’s a never-ending need for every blogger out there. Otherwise, why would we bother to blog in the first place? Might as well just write in a private diary. I look back at my years blogging and I think what helped me the most was commenting on others’ blogs. Once I started getting to know people really well, commenting whenever I could, they would eventually find their way over to my blog and comment. And it slowly (and I mean SLOWLY) built from there. My blog has grown, but at the pace of molassas running uphill in the dead of winter.
Ha ha! Perfect image. I have begun to do the comments thing more and more. Following people’s blogs, pingbacks, etc… Another great thing you do is, you ALWAYS respond to people’s. It makes us feel appreciated. Thank you.
Don’t thank me, thank you for commenting! And you should feel appreciated because I do appreciate you guys. (ah, sheesh, this is getting kinda sappy) I’ve made it my personal policy to reply to comments because I realize just how crazy busy people are and I always appreciate someone taking the time to say something. Every time I get a comment, I get all giddy. You are so right, every comment you make on other blogs, pingbacks etc. makes your blog circle grow and grow.
What I am less fond about blogging is people who write or say, “Read my blog.” But they’ve never read mine. I’ll get over that in time … I know I will. Just give me a quiet, padded cell and I’ll get this out of my system.
Darla … love your humor, even your sly tag of Justin Bieber. But, why, for the love of all that’s holy, didn’t you include Danny Bonaduce in your tag. He’s hysterical and his warped, dark sense of humor is sure to pull his fan base to your blog as well.
Haha! Yes, we all need some time in a padded cell, I know I do.
I would rather have people I’ve gotten to know over the years read my blog than the people that just breeze in for a split second during an FP, leave their link to their blog, tell me to visit theirs, then run away again. I agree, it’s kind of a give and take community here. We all should be supporting each other. It’s a long process to get to know someone through their blog (but it’s worth the time and effort!)
And about Danny Bonaduce, I almost put him as a tag, but honestly, I don’t think I could handle all the search engine terms he would’ve generated. Justin Bieber is enough.
Darla, some of the people who have said this I’ve known for years. It’d be one thing if they read my blog and hated it … but, from a comment one friend made, I don’t even think they’re aware I have a blog – even though I post it on FB.
On WordPress, friends have given me tips and encouraged me in my writing. And vice versa.
BTW, thank you for your support.
I have to say WordPress really is an amazing creative place for bloggers/writers to connect. We are all in this together so we should all be supportive of each other, boosting each other up in a positive way. This place has completely transformed my writing style. For years I didn’t write anything until I came here. and thank you for your support.
Ha! These are all great! I especially relate to #9 and #8.
I “hate” obsessing over stats. Sometimes I don’t look at them and sometimes I check them every 6 minutes. Then again, I also think it’s kind of fun.
I also “hate” how I see everything through a blog lens, as in “I could blog about that.” It would be nice to have just one day where I lived life rather than obsessed over the documentation of it. Then again, I also think that makes life a little more fun… I guess blogging’s a blessing and a curse!
Ooh, that could be WordPress’s new tagline:
WordPress: …a blessing AND a curse!
You nailed it. See, this is why I took 3 weeks off. I had to get off the crazy stat train so I could get my brain back. And now I’m back to checking stats again every 10 seconds. Sigh. I totally hear you on just wanting to enjoy the day and not think in the back of your mind, “Ooh! I should blog about this!” It really is a big addiction. I have to limit myself by saying I will only write 2-3 posts a week tops. Actually I might even start just doing one post a week. I think it would give me just enough of a little break inbetween to keep my sanity. I would rather spend most of my time just reading other people’s blogs and commenting, truly! There isn’t enough time to keep up.
Complete honesty here, I dislike when fabulous, talented and witty bloggers with 700 plus followers after only a year of blogging, don’t realize how incredibly talented they are and how impressive that is, says the blogger who has been blogging for a lot longer and only has 200plus followers. 😛
I’m not jealous or anything . . . 😉
Yeah, I’m jealous of that person,too! Grrr! Wait a sec—hey! So you think my butt does look big??!
I am jealous of fellow bloggers who’ve been blogging half the time I have yet have three times the followers. (Oops, some of them might be reading this) I mean, I’m really, really happy for them! haha! Yeah, thrilled for them! I love them! I never get jealous! Hoo-whee, never!
I hate that my freakin’ “reader” keeps dropping you from my list….or have you blocked me, Darla? Was it something I said? Huh? ‘Cause I take it all back. I have been sobbing all day…all day. I can’t even go on…Please, please, please…I’ll even write you a poem…Just don’t block me any more. ‘kay?
I don’t tell a lot of people about my blog – but my husband does…I really don’t want my students or even some of my coworkers reading it.
Let me see, the crickets – definitely the worst part.
I am not asking this in jest, but what the heck are the crickets???? I keep hearing about them, then there are ones outside of my window, but in my blog????? Huh?
When you write something brilliant – absolutely brilliant and toss it out there (like if you were at open-mike night and got up there and read your stuff) and all you hear afterwards are crickets…no applause, not even booing…just crickets
Believe me, I know more about crickets than any one woman should…
Oh, yeah. I know me some crickets. I just didn’t recognize them. I thought it was the same response I get from my husband every time I crack a joke.
Glad I’m not alone, Katy. Thanks!
Or when I ask who has read the assigned chapters at the beginning of class (It’s part of my stand-up routine).
Block YOU?! Perish the thought, Katy. I missed another one of Pegoliciousnesses’s posts this week. I think I’ve re-subsubscribed to her blog about 50 times this month and still she doesn’t show up on my reader.
I could see why you wouldn’t want your students reading your blog. If I had any students, I would do the same.
Whew, I was afraid I’d have to write a poem begging you to take me back…well, maybe I should write one anyway.
I’ve been wondering about #5 for quite a while. Okay, that’s not true.
This was a great post idea. I hate that my family and close friends must be so annoyed having to hear about the blog all the time. I know they like it, but they’ve become real-life blog comment relayers for their friends who read it but who don’t talk about it to me directly. It’s also a weird thing to balance being proud of your blog and feeling like it’s the only thing you talk about, even if you weren’t the one to bring it up.
Exactly. Blogging takes up a good deal of our time so we feel the need to talk about it with everyone, but the Walmart cashier doesn’t seem to care as much as I’d like, though.
The main question I get whenever I tell people about my blog is: Do you get paid for this?
Uh….sure! I get paid in comments…that’s good, right? They just don’t get why I’d put all this time and effort into something that doesn’t bring home the bacon. hell, I would even like to get real bacon out of this blogging deal.
Real bacon should be all the payment any blogger could need.
Oh here’s one more…it drives me crazy when I happen to write something slightly controversial (ex. saying people at Walmart are awful) and readers jump down my throat. I try to explain that it’s just for fun, but people can’t seem to help but contend any kind of opinion. I’m not trying to be a hard-hitting journalist over here. Calm down.
Good point Carly — I hate it when folks with no sense of humor read humor blogs and comment on how inappropriate you’re being. (Someone once “unliked” me because I said the Russians were going to take over the world. Oh grow up …)
That was really stupid of them, especially since everyone knows the Russians will eventually take over the world.
On the bright side, you’re probably better off not having that person continue to follow and criticize your blog.
Can I “unlike” a comment? Just kidding Carly. The woman was Russian. And had I said that the Chinese were taking over all would have been fine with her!
Exactly. I’m not writing for the New York Times. I’m just a little blogger from East Buttcrack, Maine for God’s sake. I’ve had some really nasty comments before about my parenting skills. From people that don’t know me, and obviously don’t understand dry, sarcastic humor.
Yeah…that’s weird how people who don’t blog don’t want to hear about it. I guess it’s like looking at pictures of other people’s kids. I ran into a guy I hadn’t seen in a couple of years. He said he pulled up my blog for a laugh every now and then. Then said, maybe he should subscribe. I told him not to. It would just give him another thing he’d have to delete in his email each week.
Haha! Yeah, exactly. Don’t bother, buddy. I always wonder how many people subscribe only to never read my blog again, they just end up deleting the emails. My guess is hundreds because my stats are still very low all the time. People like to click on buttons, but not much beyond that. Actual reading?? That’s asking too much. I have to admit, before I started blogging, I didn’t get the whole concept behind it or why anyone would waste their time doing it.
#9 is totally me! I’m not going to say anymore in fear that it might happen again!
P.S. Reading yours posts creep me out these days. It’s like… you’re me! Only a more funnier and cooler version of me.
I am you and you are me and we are all together (I think I’m trying to quote I Am the Walrus by the Beatles…) But me cool? I have never been considered that in my entire life. Dorky? yes. If dork is the new cool, then sure.
Yeah, I’m still waiting for #5 to happen.
My most unfavourite things about blogging? I seem to have lost two inches in height just from sitting! (Could’ve sworn I was 5’7″, but apparently not!) My room dematerializes when I’m blogging, as does the washing, the cooking (apart from other half coming in and pointing to his open mouth from time to time), the laundry, the dusting, writing letters (what the heck are they?, emails, and remembering birthdays. And anniversaries. And that it’s not daylight anymore! 😉
By the way, did I tell you I’m back in the blogosphere? As if you couldn’t guess!
Val! Sooo good to ‘see’ you again! Back to the blogging world, eh? Looks like the washing and cooking might have to wait for a bit…I hear you there.
And you write letters?! I should really try that again someday. I miss getting something in the mail other than bills.
Thanks Darla. Er… I would write letters (should write letters) if I weren’t blogging… There are several that have gone unanswered for too long…
I hate all of that and more!
But you know what I love? I love that I have found so many wonderful, brilliant and witty people who add to my life. I think even if I never get a huge following, even if people don’t regularly read what I write, like what I write, comment on what I write or think I am brilliant, wonderful or witty I will continue to do it simply with the hope and a prayer that I continue to meet others.
I completely agree, Val! (I of course think you’re wonderful, brilliant and witty)
Even though we’d all like to be read by more people, I am very content with the group I have now because I get a chance to really get to know you all through comments and reading each others’ blogs. To me, that’s the best part of blogging, the stats are very empty after awhile. It really shouldn’t matter.
This was so great, Darla! As usual, I laughed out loud. (Oh no, this is turning into one of those lame comments where I can’t think of anything clever to say. Eh. Screw it. I know we love each other anyway. ;))
THIS should get Freshly Pressed because we can all relate to it so much! ESPECIALLY (for me) numbers 4 and 11! Your blog is definitely one of my favorite things about blogging, so I’m glad you, er, give up sleep? That came out wrong.
P.S. – Re: #1 – so funny! I am super self-conscious about my blog and never talk about it in real life unless someone else brings it up first (which is usually in the form of, “You should blog about this!”). But the last time I hung out with my (closest) girlfriends, I was all, “Why haven’t they said anything nice about my blog today?! Did they talk about it last time just because it was my birthday and they had to be nice?! Did my BEST FRIEND stop reading?! OMG. What do I need to change? WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?!”
What?! You have blogging insecurities? You’ve got it goin’ on, there Jules…you and your blog are on fire lately. How could anything ever be wrong when you’re seeing the world through mustache glasses? You rock. And I’ve no doubt you’ll rock that blogging conference.
I do give up sleep. Not voluntarily…(insomnia sucks!)
I think if this was FP that would be a miracle as I’m kinda slamming blogging…but in a totally sarcastic way. (ahem)
Ditto, times 11. And, I hate that taking a break from blogging (like I’ve recently done) causes all of my insecurities to multiply inside me like a bad fungal infection leaving me certain no one would want to read my dribble ever again because no one even noticed I was gone and I was quickly replaced by someone who blogs about bad cat behavior. Blogging builds confidence in a writer is a lie…unless of course I get a lot of “hits” on a blog…at which point I’m certain the NY Times will call me if I just stay off the phone long enough.
Get outta my head! I have to admit I had a fear that if I took a long break, I’d come back to a ghost town with nothing but tumbleweeds and crickets. I’m not sure I’ll ever be confident in my blog to tell the truth. I guess as a writer, this kind of insecurity and self-doubt comes with the territory.
Okay, I’m a little late to the party, but what I said in the last comment, I TRIED to leave, is that number 9 is the story of my life–only I’m not gonna know, cause there is NO way I’m gonna read ALL of these comments. Plus, this is a piss-poor excuse for a comment anyway. However, this really was a fun post. Seriously. I’m not just saying that cause I have noting better to say. Well, maybe I am. What can I say, it’s been one of those weeks, Darla.
Hugs,
Kathy
I think your comments are always the absolute Best, Kathy! Piss-poor excuse–that cracked me up! And I hear you, it’s been one of those weeks for me, too…one of those decades…
Great post. I could relate to every thing you wrote in this post.
Darla, I do not think there is anything which I do not like about your blog. But there are more than 11 things about blogging which I am not fond of. 🙂 When I get notification of someone hitting a like on one of my post and I wait for few minutes to get the notification of that person’s comment. Then I realize that, that person is already gone for a quick nap. And when I write a post of more than thousand words and get a reply of only two words- “great” and “post”. It really hurts. 🙂
I’m glad you guys can relate to this stuff. I’ve thought these things since day one but never thought to write a post about it.
Really enjoyed reading this! I’m sure tons of us feel this way…except you made it really funny. 😉
I especially can’t stand not being able to edit or delete comments. That’s just wrong. 😦
thanks! I love your gravatar pic, so sweet. And it is very wrong we can’t edit our comments. Half the time I’m typing them on my iPad and I end up with tons of typos. Or I just write something really stupid.
Thanks, that puppy is too cute. 😀 Haha, that’s actually why I don’t use my tablet for this kind of thing, I know I’d get too frustrated and then end up commenting a second (or third) time to apologize for my mistake and/or stupidity. 😉
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Oh boy– as soon as you talked about leaving comments that other people have already left before, you had me quaking in my boots! I’m always late to the commenting party in the summer months, but darn it if I have time to read through all the posts I’ve missed *and* all the comments! Give a girl a break, why don’t you? 😉 (SARCASM ALERT)
On a serious note, I was actually thinking about subscribers the other day. I was asking myself (hypothetically, of course) if I would ever swap the community I already have on my blog for more subscribers and possibly newer blog friends/commenters. The answer is NO! I’ve been blogging for 4+ years on WP and have yet to crack the 150 subscriber mark. (For real!) However, I think a larger percentage of my subscribers actually *read* my posts and/or *engage* with them via comments than a lot of other bloggers get. That, to me, is priceless. I’ve definitely noticed that people with 1000+ subscribers are usually nowhere near 1000 comments on their posts, so I can take solace in that. (And I do.) 🙂
My feelings exactly, Dana. Numbers aren’t what we should be aiming for in the end. The main thing that draws me back to blogging are the real connections I’ve made with other people. I am addicted to that more than any empty stat.
hi darla! this is such a fun – tastic post……. no. 4 hit me at the right spot! that’s my bane . I have never tagged a post Justin Bieber. 🙂 Maybe that’s why hardly anyone ever reads them! 🙂 Will make sure it makes its way to my list of “most used tags” Thanks for the tip!! 🙂 🙂 And getting the option to delete one’s own comment is only fair. Don’t you think? Also I would love a set of smileys / emoticons…. how nice to be able to wink or yawn or roll one’s eyes!! makes life so much easier…. is anyone at WP listening???
I am waiting for WP to add some cool zippy emoticons whenever I make a comment…maybe some fireworks or confetti/balloons would be nice. The only problem with using Justin Bieber as a tag? You get loads of Justin Bieber fans coming to your blog in droves.
I just discovered something amazing (unless it’s not), and I had to share. I CAN edit comments, but only on my blog. Is that normal for everyone?! I can even edit other people’s comments? Which is weird, why would I want to change what someone else said?! Ahh!
Yes, this is normal for everyone. Wouldn’t it be great to sift through and edit everyone’s comments on your own blog? I could delete all of them and replace it with stuff like: Darla, you rock! Darla, you are the best blogger ever!! I LOVE YOU! (My ego could really use a boost some days…)
Damn, I can’t believe I only just noticed then, oh well. Aw, you don’t need to edit anyone’s comments, everyone seems to love your blog, with reason. 😉
I have no idea why. (I mean, thank you! I have a hard time accepting compliments due to my Irish background…)
What I hate about blogging? Arriving late, reading at last count 111 comments so I won’t be redundant…but maybe I am…please don’t quiz me. I loved this especially #5…still waiting for that or chocolate would be nice.
Are you back?? So happy to see you again! 😀
If chocolate was involved in blogging, I would never leave my computer again.
I’m not fond of how I feel like a big failure when I’m not moved to write a post for 10-15 days. I wonder what’s wrong with me, what’s happened to me, whether I’ve lost “it” (whatever “it” is), whether my life is just incredibly boring and I have absolutely nothing to write about (which is why I don’t call my mother more often – nothing to report that she would want to hear), whether I’ll die alone 50 years from now in a terrible recliner in a hideous nightgown in front of my television where I’d sat for days and no one will know I’m dead until a neighbor wonders why there’s blue television light coming out of the windows at all hours of the day and night for the last two months…
Yup. All from not posting enough.
See this is why I blog. I plan to keep blogging into my old age. So people will know when I’m dead. If a weeks passes, and there’s no new posts, they’ll call the cops to go check on me.
I can identify with several of your “not very fond of” items. I thought maybe my slot was clogged since I didn’t get skittles, or money or anything when I hit publish. Maybe I need a new computer?
I am so relieved to know it’s not just my computer, Patti.
I’m having comment performance issues right now. There are so many and it’s already Friday and you posted this on…I don’t even know because there are so many comments that I have to scroll up really high!
I think I took my blogging break because my blog was finally on a little bit of a roll and I apparently fear success and like to sabotage myself. Either that or I was afraid of burnout. I like blogging too much and I don’t want to get all soured and cynical on it. Now I’m back to trying to get more content and more traffic so more people will see my blog. I’ve always been a very private person; I never thought I’d be such a whore for attention 😉
Here’s a funny story. Maybe. Yesterday, I saw a huge spike in my stats. I had published a post about a Grammar Girl thing on Twitter a couple of weekends ago, and so she posted it on her Facebook page and Twitter feed but I didn’t know that. When I first checked my stats at around 1:30 or so, I was at something like 250 hits. Half an hour later it was over 300. Then it was 350. I was all, ‘What the hell??’ I spent half an hour searching Google and WordPress forums to see if there was a FB glitch that was mistakenly working like a referrer spam. I checked Freshly Pressed, but nope. Not on there. I was convinced it was a mistake until I finally saw my Twitter feed and figured it out.
So now I have a bar on Thursday that goes all the way up to 665 hits. Every other day, of course, was 50-ish, so they look tiiiiiny. It’s kinda neat and kinda depressing at the same time.
You sound like me, I could’ve have typed out the first two paragraphs myself! I am a very shy, private person normally. I was never comfortable with being in the spotlight but with this blog, I’m forcing myself to be more extroverted. I have to say, it’s fun. But still, I get all weird about success, too. You see those soaring stats and it’s a giddy feeling, then I kinda feel a bit insecure at the same time when they inevitably plummet again. I know what you’re talking about. It took my two years to just take a chill pill and not get wrapped up too much in the stats (I still check them all the time, it’s an addiction) but I want to concentrate more on forging those lasting blogging relationships, getting to know people–that is what makes blogging worthwhile, the stats are fleeting.
When was the last time you published something and got fewer than a hundred comments? You have a loyal following, Darla, and it’s only going to get bigger. One of the reasons is that you care so much, as illustrated by the obvious torment flowing through your head every minute of the day. And your incredible skills as a writer.
“If I don’t blog, I die a little inside. Then I curse myself for being addicted. And I die inside a little more.” See what I mean?
It is a torment, Charles…you’re right. Writing is something I don’t choose to do, it’s something I have to do.
I’ve been to the mountaintop — and I glimpsed error-free comments at last! It was when I traveled across the Atlantic to Jessseeker’s blog, I noticed that you could edit your comments (!) indefinitely.
I love this post but I have to admit that it’s making my August bloggy vacation plans seem all the more enticing.
Ooh! I love Jessseeker’s blog already, but you can edit your own comments there?? I’m in love now.
PS Don’t go on bloggy vaca! 😦
What? Did I just read that? You can edit your own comments? In someone else’s comment stream? Do tell…
Well, don’t get too excited, Shannon. Apparently you have to leave WP and get another blog for that magic to happen. I know, it’s really stinks, doesn’t it. I want the ability to edit everything I see on the internet!
Now wait just a gosh-darn, cotton-picking minute. How did I miss this post? How, for the ever-lovin’ love of Pete, did I possibly miss this gem…this diamond…this absolutely perfect melding of words that speaks so much truth to the pain that is blogging? How????? HOWWW?????
Nice job, Darla.
I know, how did you miss this one? It has you written all over it! Because we share the same brain. Explains a lot, doesn’t it?
All eleven, but the worst is when you think you just wrote something awesome… but WordPress isn’t working right that day. So, you shelve it, but the love you had for it never returns, and it sits on the hard drive forever.
It’s the “one who got away” syndrome. And it’s just funny how much we love our little creations. We self-deprecate, but in reality, you create something, and it’s kinda like a newborn baby. Whether it’s actually cute or actually ugly, it’s all yours.
Well said. Every post is like that..sometimes I don’t reveal them to the blogging world because they’re TOO personal. But everything we create is an extension of ourselves, much like a baby.
Unicorns and Skittles? Where are they handing those out?
I was thinking of including a giant bag of Skittles as part of my contest prize package but I know I wouldn’t be able to part with it.
Everybody said everything I was thinking and wanted to say here so I will just say, thanks. 🙂 Thanks for writing what was in my thoughts. 🙂
You write really funny stuff. I think writing with a sense of humour is at once the most difficult and the most gratifying kind of writing. You make the reader smile…Ain’t that a generous thing to do in this stingy world?
Thank you! You are so right–it takes me twice as much work to write humor than the more poignant stuff. But the payoff is bigger in my mind. I never tire of getting people to laugh.
Yes! The relative thing. It’s upsetting. Sometimes they’ll read it when they stumble upon my blog on facebook (cuz I have it get posted on facebook every time I make a blog post). But they never comment on my stuff (except, sometimes RARELY on facebook, not on the blog itself) and not a single one of them is a follower of my blog. I keep telling them that if they want to know what’s going on in my life to read the darn blog, but nobody ever does! It’s extremely annoying. Sigh.
Not a single one of my relatives follows my blog either. I think they think they’ll just read it on facebook, but I always forget to even visit facebook anymore as I hate hate hate it now.
Me, too! I only go to Facebook now for my Talking Kidney Productions page and for working on filmmaking networking stuff. For me, personally, I find Facebook to be a giant time suck, and I’d rather have my time sucked by my blog. 🙂
My main problem is not enough time. Look at the date? I couldn’t get here sooner. I’m always struggling to catch up. I don’t have a job where I can check the internet during the day so I only have a window of a couple of hours each night, which is basically taken up with household chores…
I can’t imagine having a job where you could get paid to surf the web! Wouldn’t that be nice? I hear you, Rosie.I am starting school next week full time so I’m hoping I can catch up with blogs on the weekends at night.