I remember the day so vividly. It was 25 years ago when an earworm inched its way into the deepest recesses of my feeble teenage brain and permanently entered my subconscious. Sometimes late at night when I’m alone, I still faintly hear this dreaded tune, taunting me from beyond.
It was the summer of 1988, and the day started like so many others. I curled, feathered and Aqua-Netted my hair until it was a sufficient height of five inches, tied on my forest green L.L. Bean apron, and headed to my retail job at the store. After clocking into work, I began folding a mountain of plaid turtlenecks in the Women’s clothing section. My co-worker, Lisa, yelled from her corner by the registers, “Yo, Darla! Whassup? What song is it today?”
“Riders on the Storm,” I said, shaking my head.
“Ooh! That’s not so bad!”
“Yeah, but it’s only the part when the rain and thunder crash and Jim Morrison is ominously singing so…yeah….it’s a bit unnerving…” I plopped a small heap of flannel nightgowns onto my station. “How ’bout you? Whatcha got today? Anything really bad?”
“It’s Pour Some Sugar On Me,” she groaned.
“Yikes. Sorry,” I offered.
“I’ve had it in my head for days. Only the chorus. Over and over.”
“I wasn’t aware there was more to that song but the chorus.”
“Well, it’s driving me stark raving mad,” she said while walking over to me. “I’m heading into my second week with this thing.”
“Eh. I’ve heard of worse,” I said while stuffing a pair of camouflage long johns into a plastic sleeve. “You remember my friend Mike? Yeah, well, a few years ago, he had “Jingle Bells” playing on a nonstop loop in his head for like, five months.”
“Get out.”
“I haven’t spoken to him in awhile. No one knows what happened to him. I think he ended up going to see a therapist.”
“Tragic, ” Lisa put her elbow on my table and leaned forward, resting her head in her hand. “Sooooo….what’s the worst song you’ve ever had stuck in your head and for how long?”
“Oh, no, no, no, no,” I chuckled. “I’m not fallin for that, Lisa.”
“C’mon!” she slammed her hand down. “What was it? You can tell me! Maybe that song will replace this Def Leppard song!”
“Forget it.”
“It’s already playing in your head, isn’t it?”
“No! It’s not! It’s–” I picked up a stack of Bomber hats and stormed off, Lisa following close behind. She grabbed my arm.
“Please?”
“You’re gonna regret it.”
“Pretty please?”
“You don’t realize the power of this song! It’s gonna ruin your life! Just let it be, Lisa! For the love of all that is holy! Let it be!”
“Just tell me what the song is!”
“God! Ahhhh! Fine!” I slammed the hats down onto a shelf. “It’s I’m never gonna give you up!” I yelled, my voice carrying across the store. A few customers glanced our way, scowling. I lowered my voice into an angry whisper. “Never gonna let you down! Never gonna run around. And desert you!” I put my head in my hands and began to sob. “Never…gonna…make you cry…” I continued to sing, my voice quivering. “Never gonna say…goodbye…ah! Make it stop! For god’s sake, make it stop! Why, Lisa? Why did you do this to me? Are you happy? Cuz I sure hope you’re happy! At least Def Leppard’s outta your head now, right?”
“Hmm….” Lisa sighed and scratched her head.
“Right?”
“Nope, nothing. Still got Pour Some Sugar On Me. But thanks though, Darla. You tried.”
“I hate you.”
And so concludes my cautionary tale about the day the worst earworm in the history of the universe descended upon my soul never to give me up, never to let me down, never to run around and desert me.
_______________________________________________________
You’ve got it in your head now, too, don’t you?
Um….sorry?
What’s the worst earworm you’ve ever had? How long did it last? What’s in your head right now? Maybe it will replace Rick Astley!
She's A Maineiac 
“You Light Up My Life” by Debbie Boone. It lasted for months in the 1970s. Then in the 1990s my office mate had a CD no doubt entitled “Songs Elyse Hates Most” and it started with that horrible song. She would put it on and leave the office with it playing. Somehow I refrained from violence. Now there is a TV ad that sneaks up on me playing it. Life is just unfair, Darla. It is just unfair.
Still, Darla, you do light up my life. You give me hope. To carry on.
Oh god! Yeah, that is pretty damn terrible. Debbie Boone! ugh! I feel for you, I really do.
I think I had Blondie’s “Heart of Glass” alternating with Queen’s “Another one bites the dust” stuck in my head the better part of the early 80s. It was a confusing time.
Does that mean you were biting glass???? Not a healthy situation, Darla. Not healthy at all.
What’s really incredible? Right now I have a loop of all three of those songs we’re talking about going in my head all at once. I am multi-talented with the earworms.
those two are not so bad to have caught in your head are they
Damn that earthworm! He leaves me with Disney songs, that’s right, Disney songs in my head. Mostly Disney PRINCESS songs! And then my soul wants to shrivel up and die.
Having your soul shrivel up and die isn’t a worse fate than hearing the songs from Beauty and the Beast over and over again. I’m SO with you on that one, Audrey. Thanks to my daughter, I know every line and song to every princess movie.
I just noticed how my auto correct inserted “earthworm” instead of “earworm” – slightly disturbing but it still is a less horrid fate than being plagued by an earworm and it’s terrible music. My condolences about the princess movies!
God how I wish I had an earthworm inside my ear right now instead of Rick Astley.
I can’t believe you Rick Rolled me in a blog post! 😉 Well done, Darla. Well done!
I’m so evil. Truth be told, Kim, I had no idea what Rickrolling was until I went to google Rick Astley just now.
I actually have Rick Astley and Def Leppard doing a celebrity death match in my head now. It’s kind of interesting. My retaliation to people that earworm me is one word, which works so well for me because I am apparently the only person on the planet who doesn’t know this song: Convoy.
OH GOD! CONVOY!!
Well….
Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
I take it you don’t like Convoy, Katy?
That’s a big 10-4
Nope. Not going to watch it.
You are so much smarter than I am.
I saw someone’s blog post about Salzburg and I had “16 going on 17” in my head for DAYS. No amount of dubstep or death metal blasted through my ears made the slightest bit of difference either. Damn you, Rodgers and Hammerstein!
When death metal can’t blast it away, you know you’re in trouble. The catchier the tune, the more you are doomed.
Ear worms. Never heard them called that before. Yesterday, I kept breaking out into song and the song was from Phantom of the Opera: Music of the Night. ALL DAY. And I didn’t know all the words so I had to hum my way through most of it and make up some lyrics, which were pretty good actually, but I couldn’t remember them, so I kept making up new stuff. I think even Scrappy was annoyed…
I love to make up my own lyrics to songs. Almost every single day I wake up and belt out “Oh what a craptastic mor-ning! Oh what a craptastic day! I’ve got back pain and a head-ache! nothing is going my way!”
Rodgers and Hammerstein, move over! 🙂
I do sing that song with gusto each morning, Lorna. I’m quite good.
John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt. My husband has relatives with a name similar to Jingleheimer, so every time I have to mail something to them, it gets stuck in my head for days. And it’s already one of those songs that never ends.
Ooh, that’s a good (bad) one! “whenever we go out, the people always shout…! there goes John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt!” ba-ba-da-ba-da-da. It’s in my head now. Well done.
Whoa, this might just be the worst earworm I’ll ever have. Thanks, Rachel!
You’re welcome. 🙂
LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!!!
Hahahaha!! Oh, JD! I wish I could leave her alone now. I wish to God I could.
My husband has a habit of whistling whatever song was playing when he got out of the car. But he usually only knows the chorus. So he whistles the chorus over and over and over, and I go to sleep thinking that will end it, but no…I wake up with that little bugger in my head. The absolute worst is “Hey, Soul Sister.” (ain’t that mister mister on the radio, stereo, the way you move ain’t fair you know…)
I think the very act of talking, writing, thinking, reading about earworms wakes them up. It’s a diabolical plan, Darla. Diabolical.
🙂
Oh,my oh MY, Jeannette. You have picked a doozy. Hey Soul Sister? Probably the worst earworm to come down the pike in years. My daughter absolutely adores that song. She made us put it on our iPod. It just sticks in your brain for days and never wants to let go. I have it in my head right now. Rick Astley a distant memory now. I kinda wish Rick would come back to be honest. Well done!
And yes, this is the most diabolical post I’ve ever done. Mwa ha haa!
I can’t believe I was just Rickrolled without even clicking on a link! You’re evil, Darla, pure evil.
Over Christmas break I watched all of the first two seasons of Downton Abbey back-to-back. There’s a bit of incidental music that they play a lot on that show, and I couldn’t get it out of my head for weeks afterwards.
Y’know, I’ve always imagined I would only use this blog for good and not evil. I’ve changed. Blogging has completely hardened me.
I’ve also had themes to TV shows stuck in my head before, not a good thing. I wish I knew the song from Downton Abbey you speak of, maybe it would be better than Rick.
I actually don’t remember how that song goes, which is a good thing. But it was the “something dramatic is about to happen” music, so I always kept expecting dramatic stuff to happen while I was hearing it.
I adopted a kitten a couple months ago, and she’s full of kitten energy. She’s also addicted to the laser pointer. Every night when I go to bed, she insists on chasing the laser dot around — and when she does, I hear “Gangnam Style” song in my head, except instead of “Gangnam Style”, the words are “Laser time”.
I can’t tell you how much I love your kitten-laser-gangham-style story! Gangham style is one of those tunes that will pop up at the weirdest times. I’ll be washing dishes and all of a sudden I’m yelling out “Whoop! Whoop! Whoop! Open Gangham style!” Or I’ll put on my bathrobe in the morning and suddenly it’s “heyyy! sexy lady!”
It’s actually worse than an earworm — it’s an eye-and-ear worm. I see an entire video of kittens frolicking with laser pointers to the tune of “Woop! Woop! Woop! Laser time!” and “Hey, crazy kitty”.
Well, he’s telling you right there in the song. I’m not sure why you are surprised. He’s NEVER gonna give you up, NEVER gonna let you go, NEVER gonna run around and desert you!! NEVER. NEVER EVER.
Oh, yeah . . . that reminds me. That’s the one that gets stuck in my head. The Taylor Swift song . . .
You’re welcome . . . 😉
Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
I second that. The Taylor Swift song was in my head for weeks. Darn.
So sorry, Katy! hey, aren’t you supposed to be responding to a zillion comments right now? I am thrilled that you were FP. It’s about time!
There were only half a zillion comments but I gotta hang with my peeps…the ones who knew me back when
Kudos to you, Misty. Not only is that the worst song ever written, it’s probably the worst video. I wouldn’t know because I refuse to click on it. I can’t start my day that way. I want to keep my will to live intact.
Hahaha! I’ve never heard the term “ear worm.” It reminds me of an old Twilight Zone episode where this guy has a weird bug crawl into his ear and chew through his brain. He almost went insane/died through the painful process before it came out the other ear. The doctor treating him then breaks the news that the bug was a female who showed signs of having just given birth to dozens of tiny offspring…
Bet you have a nice, new image to replace that song in your mind, don’t you? Your welcome.
I would gladly accept having dozens of tiny bugs implanted inside my head than listen to Rick Astley.
BY the way, that ear picture with the little heads is shear, visual genius.
God bless you for saying so, Pegomine. I can’t tell you how much fun I had making teeny tiny Rick Astley heads. The joys of my Paint program. I learned from you, the Master.
I wrote a post a few back which made reference to Betty White, the last surviving Golden Girl. I had that hideous theme song on a continuous loop in my tortured brain for WEEKS! I’m so happy to finally be able to move on with my life without having…Oh Crap!….Thanks Darla, THANK YOU FOR BEING A FRIEND….
Oh! Well, that is bad! And I absolutely adore the Golden Girls.
But I’m truly sorry, Dave.
Oh and one more thing before I go:
“thank you for being a friend…traveled down the road and back again! Your heart is true, you’re a pal and a confidant! And if you threw a party…..invited everyone you knew! You would see the biggest gift would be from me…and the card attached would say….” You know the rest, right?
You’ll Bea sorry,
In fact, you’ll Rue the day,
You’d bEstelle your friends,
I Bettyou already regret that comment…
Ugh…I disgust myself…
Ha!!!
Nice. Very nice.
Well, it *was* “Firewoman” by The Cult, until I started reading through the comments! Now I have a multi-track listing of earworms!
Ooh! Love that song! Fiyaaaaaaaaaaa smoke she is arisin! Fi-yaaaaaaaa!
I actually heard of an earworm yesterday on SpongeBob…I just so happened to be in my three year old daughter’s room while she was watching it. I’ve had quite a few of them myself, thank goodness not lately. Lol!
Spongebob! My son was obsessed with that show and there was a time when I had the song “Best Day Ever!” in my head for weeks. The theme song is bad enough.
Lol! Spongebob can definitely find some way to get stuck in a person’s head lol!
Thank god I can safely safe neither of my kids watch Spongebob anymore. But they graduated to other obnoxious shows like Jesse and Good Luck Charlie.
Yeah and he’s tradin’ in his Chevy for a Cadillacacacacacacacac
You oughta know by now.
Over and over and over and over again. Just those two lines. Thanks so much Billy Joel.
Haha! Oh, god. Terrible, just terrible! I think anytime you end a line echoing “acacacacac” it’s a bad sign. Gives me a heartattackackackackackack…
Honestly? It’s a classical piece. Mozart. It is a SERIOUS problem when you’re humming Mozart at work all the time. Nobody understands.
Back in college I listened to classical music all the time and constantly had Clair de Lune in my head. Not a bad thing though as it’s one of my favorites. I love me some good Mozart as well.
When you got to the song, I laughed out loud, LOUDLY. I love picturing you workin’ at The Bean of Two L’s. (How’s THAT for a sweet commute, huh?)
That song is amazing. Until it’s not.
My worst earworm is probably… wow. Okay. I don’t know how widespread this radio commercial is, but it’s one they play regularly here: 1-877-CARS-4-KIDS. It has the most tone-deaf jingle EVER. As soon as it starts, I freak out and switch the station, but it’s ALWAYS TOO LATE.
You’re welcome.
Hahaha!!! OH MY GOD. That is just awful! I will have that in my head all day now. Thanks!
yeah, I had quite the commute to Bean’s. I lived right next door. On my lunch break I’d walk home and eat a bologna sandwich. Good times.
This sounds like a medical emergency to me — Rick Astley in your ears. As a soon-to-be nurse, tell us something can be done to save the patient!
I wish. Unfortunately, we haven’t gotten to the chapter in our anatomy book that deals with the treatments for horrendous earworms. But I did get that snazzy diagram of the ear from my textbook so my education isn’t a total waste now.
I’m busy listening to a Scrubs song that I love (Jeremy Kaye’s “Have It All”), so I’m blessedly–if temporarily–immune to earworms. Speaking of Scrubs, they actually have an entire episode featuring an Erasure earworm. (God, how I love this show! But really, now I’m going back to Jeremy Kaye. And, um, work. Yes, that.)
I love Scrubs too! I have a tiny crush on Zach Braff. But I think I actually missed the Erasure episode. I’ll have to go watch it later on.
Awesome article! I often get songs stuck in my head, but I didn’t know there was an acceptable technical term for it. Thanks for teaching me something wicked awesome, my fellow Mainah! 😉
It’s what I’m here for. Certainly not to make any money.
Ha! $13 is a huge amount to some people… 😛
at the rate I’m posting, I should be able to snag around a buck and some change by next year!
I always had a general blog question/quest for advice that I just emailed to the address you list in your contact me section. Hope you don’t mind…
I never mind! Hey, any other questions, I’d be happy to help.
Thanks, Use Mainers have got to stick together!
You just Blog-Rick-Rolled us. Aaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrggggggggggghhhhhhhh. Damn you.
Bwah hahahahhahahaha! I have gone to the dark side of blogging. And it feels damn good.
Your post had a really strange effect on me. Instead of earworming me with Rick Astley’s “Never Gonna Give You Up”, it infected me with “Never Never Gonna Give You Up” by Barry White and then Lisa Stansfield.
And by the way, there is a way to cure that earworm. You just have to find a song or two that you know really well and for a very long time, that has more or less repetitive melody, and one that’s not remotely catchy (you’ll know it could be the one if you’ve never caught yourself singing it), then sing it aloud once or twice. I have found a song that works for me, but unfortunately it won’t be useful to you since you probably never heard of it – it’s not in English.
Hmm…I’ll have to try that trick. Something that’s not catchy. I’ll have to think long and hard on that one. I just tried and came up with a Coldplay song and well, it’s too damned catchy. Man!
Coldplay? No, those 3 songs I know are too catchy for that trick. Try “Old McDonald had a farm”
And just so that you could test if this works…
“Never gonna give you up,
Never gonna let you down
Never gonna run around and desert you”
Y’know they DO only have three songs, don’t they? And they all suspiciously sound the same….pretty much interchangable tunes…
MMMbop…
I’m Walkin on Sunshine, Whoa-Oh….
Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves….
Oh, please make me stop……
ooh! Good one! Walking on Sunshine is PERFECT. “and don’t it feel good?” No. “and don’t it feel good?” Shut up. “and don’t it feel good?” Kill me now.
That Rick Astley song is enjoyable in very small doses (and in an ironic way, of course). He has one of those voices that just *doesn’t fit* his appearance. How does such a deep and creamy voice come out of such a frail and mega-white redhead? Shakes head at the injustice of it all.
I tend to get Axl Rose screaming “Sweet Child O Mine” in my head at the most inopportune moments. My sister, too. Once we both spontaneously burst into the same chorus at the same time, without even knowing that the other one was suffering from the Guns N Roses earworm. Spooky!
I will give Rick credit for having a souful voice. Did he ever have any other songs, though?
I am freaking out about your Axl Rose story because, I kid you not, I had Sweet Child O Mine in my head recently. And it was just the last line over and over “sweeeet chiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiild of mi-yi-yiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine.”
[shifty eyes] Now that’s just weird. Mine usually starts out with the ‘whooooooaaa’s, but still– what are the odds?
Sometimes all I hear over and over is: where do we go? where do we go now? where do we go?
I’m feeling your pain, Darla. Here’s something to take your mind off all of this:
“It’s a Small World After All … It’s a Small World After All.” As I sing this, I keep seeing those little Disney characters bobbing along.
Dang it, Darla. I planned to write on this topic this coming week. Now, I’m curled in a fetal position, knowing I’ve been Rick-rolled, and whimpering as I hear him sing. 🙂
Judy, I once took my two year old son on the “It’s a Small World After All” ride at Disney in Florida. At the end of the boat ride, we came out and my ears were bleeding. It was pretty traumatic.
You should still write about this on your blog!
I do have that tune in my head now, and it’s okay. I love being Rickrolled. I adore that tune and I love his video. I am happily beginning my day with that tune in my head. Thank you. It’s better than meth.
I am so happy to help you start your day right, Jean!
whatis with Jessie`s Girl –always thought this was a poor excuse for a song and once you hear it –it won`t go away never ever
Another good one! Whenever I think of that song, another one from the 80s sneaks up on me:
“Jenny I got your number! I gotta make you mine! Jenny, don’t change your number!
867-5309!”
I remember that one too – that number just keeps getting repeated and repeated — okay now it is earwigging me
Sorry?
I had no idea it was called an earworm. I don’t think I can call it that. It’s freaking me out.
Tonight I’m going to sleep with pantyhose on my head, so nothing gets in my ears.
Hahaha! Oh, thoughtsy. You actually made me choke from laughing. And I almost died and my earworm along with me, but alas, it’s not to be. Sigh…..
THIS. Since 4 days *sob*
Oh I really feel sorry for you! What’s sad is I didn’t even know that song was Taylor Swift! Figures. My kids LOVE that song. When it comes on the radio a part of me dies a little.
I had know idea there was a name for this condition either. I have suffered from it for decades now. I was a teeny bopper in the 80’s listening and drooling over Rick Springfield’s “Jessie’s Girl.” I secretly imagined he was singing that about me!
Me too, Anka. (sigh) Me too. I even had a poster of him on my bedroom wall. Right next to Shaun Cassidy.
Oops! I meant “no idea.” The coffee is already wearing off and it’s my second cup.
And I didn’t even notice the typo! Must stop drinking wine….
Blasphemy! Oh Darla . . . you NEVER stop drinking the wine.
I thought you knew better than that. Don’t let me hear you talking that shiz ever again.
Cheers!!
You are so right, Misty. What was I thinking?
So so funny! Not sure what it says about me – but I like both songs. Sad, eh?
I haven’t heard the song “Friday” by some chick, but I hear that makes a pretty intense earworm.
You’re welcome.
Y’know, I must be the only other person on the planet who has never heard the song Friday. I intend to keep it that way.
Nope. I haven’t heard it either, and like you – I intend to keep it that way. We’re smart like that, Darla.
I wouldn’t go so far as saying I’m smart though, I purposefully looked up the video for Never Gonna Give You Up. (by the way, Jim actually LIKES that song too!)
I’ve noticed lately that it’s just one line from a song that repeats over and over. Sometimes I go to bed with it in my head and when I wake up in the morning it’s still there, and I worry that it was playing all night. But what really scares me is when I say to myself, “Okay, that’s it, enough. I have important things to think about!” And one second later, the song starts up again. I don’t know who’s in charge, but it doesn’t seem to be me.
I know you’re suffering with this, Darla, but as long as you can keep producing great posts, I’m willing to live with it.
I do the same thing, I worry it was playing all night long. Apparently, neither of us is in charge. I also seem to get these really horrible and intense earworms when I’m really sick with a fever. It’s just an endless loop of one specific line over and over again. The brain is a mystery and I’m completely clueless about most of it.
Okay, I am so giving away my age….this was in my head for so long, for years in fact I won’t post it hear due to some of the language
Country Joe McDonald – Feel Like I’m Fixin to Die Rag, Woodstock 1969
I drove my family insane singing this song, round the clock. Dad would turn on the news, I would sing the song. Family would get together, I would sing the song. Knew every word.
I have never heard of this song, Val! I’ll have to go find it on youtube. Or maybe I shouldn’t?
Go find it, the name is correct. When you hear it you will know it. Everyone knows it.
OH yeah! Of course! It’s stuck in my head now for all eternity now. I thought it was called “What are we fightin for?”
Gotta love a song that says “whoopee! We all gonna die!”
♪Scarborough Fair…parsley, sage, rosemary, and thyme♪remember me…♪ and anything Simon and Garfunkel. Thank goodness for my husband…he knows everything and when I want to sing out he can give me the words when they just don’t come…in a manner of speaking.
The worst was in high school when I was a long distance track runner. I’d hear some song in my head on lap number one and it’d have to stay with me for the full eight laps. I wanted to run myself into a goal post before I got to the finish line.
Baby Got Back is a usual suspect that comes to mind. I can sing every verse and I’m not proud of that.
Hi there, Angie!! How the heck are ya? I MISS YOU!!! Oh and one more thing:
I like big butts and I can’t deny….
Uh…I just commented at the same time YOU were commenting. Cue creepy twilight music..
Nuh-uh! That is creepy since I only comment on blogs about once a month. What are the odds? Like right up there with me conquering the Legend of Zelda or something.
Yeah. And I was sifting through old posts looking for a certain commenter’s blog and saw little ol’ you at the bottom with a comment and I thought: HEY! I know! I’ll reply to her old comment here and one day she’ll get on wordpress and see her little orange notification light and it’ll be from ME and she’ll remember my blog fondly and the banter we used to have and then we would get matching Wonder Twin rings and activate them.
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What a fun post to read; though it raises plenty of memories of earworms. The worst earworm I have had is actually my current earworm…it seems that when I don’t have music playing in the background and I am completing some task in the kitchen, I whistle or root-doot-doot ‘Yellow Submarine’ by the Beatles. No. Matter. What. Every time! How?!