First and Last…with Elyse from FiftyFourandAHalf

Welcome to a new feature where I showcase a blogger every month!
It’s super cool and totally unoriginal!

Plus, Elyse really is the cat’s meow–you’ll love her, her writing and her blog.

So go on over and be sure to check out her two, yes, TWO Freshly Pressed posts, both with the words “Hey Doc” in the title.

Oh and she has two Academy awards! Well, she had them in her possession for at least a full minute or two. And in my book, that counts.



Name: Elyse

Blog: FiftyFourandAHalf


Blog Post:   Hello WorldInterestingly, it was about how they were going to change Medicare eligibility for folks over 55 – I was 6 months away and it seemed horribly unfair.  That was close to two years ago and I was 54-1/2.  Today I read that they’re talking about changing it for folks over 59.  I am 56.  Shit.

Kiss:  Ricky after our first date to see The Sword and the Stone.
Ricky and I were 7 – he was the brother of my sister Beth’s date.  His brother made him kiss me goodnight.  We were both mortified.

Love:  Eddie in 9th/10th grade.  He had Type I diabetes (the only fight we had was when he wouldn’t eat the birthday cake I’d made for him.  I was a dope and didn’t understand).  I just Googled him.  Sadly he died in 2006 from complications of his diabetes.  I only just found out.

Childhood Memory:  I can clearly recall standing in my crib, not feeling very well.  My sisters in their beds across the room weren’t feeling very well either.  My mother was leaning over me, changing my sheets and said “Leasie, you can’t throw up again.  This is the last clean crib sheet.”  Guess what happened next!


Moment I met my significant other:  I wrote about meeting my husband in this post:  A Love (?) Story

Time I did something really scary:  I grew up next to the New York-New Haven Railroad.  My brother and I used to wait for a train to round the bend about ½ mile away.  Then we’d pull down our pants and hop across the tracks with our pants between our ankles and our knees.  Thinking of it makes me shudder.

Time I felt ‘grown-up’:  The first time I bought my own socks.  Sometime around 1976, although I didn’t note the date.  I should have.  Nobody should have to spend their hard-earned money on socks.

ugly socks

Job I had:

Lobbyist responsible for getting Congress to designate 1985 as “The Oil Heat Centennial.”  I wish I were making that up.

Thing I think God will say to me at the pearly gates: “Elyse, you won’t need any more stinkin’ poop jokes up here.”


Blog Post: A post for the THIS One Should Have Been Freshly Pressed series over at
Peg-o-leg’s Ramblings blog: Corrective Packaging

Thing I cooked:  Eggs over easy

Movie I saw:  Lincoln  (I don’t get out much)


Book I read:  Ripple by Bloggin’ Buddy E.L. Farris of Running from Hell with El.  It is fantastic.

Music I listened to:  Linda Ronstadt’s “Don’t Cry Now” on the radio just as I got to work.

Reality TV show I watched:  I don’t.  Ever.  I do read the “recraps” from Speaker7, though.  I don’t understand the popularity of reality TV shows.  I don’t understand why anyone would want to participate in one.  I don’t understand what the world is coming to that this a major form of “entertainment.”  Any one of us bloggers could come up with a creative idea for a TV show.  Shoot me before you force me to watch a reality show, please.


Person I kissed:  Cooper, my dog, this morning on my way out the door.  Dogs are people too.  And yes, my husband knows.

Time I cried:  Wait you want the dark stuff, too?  Just now, when I read that my very first real boyfriend (9th/10th grade) had died in 2006.

Time I laughed hysterically:  When I saw the pictures on your “Very Bad Profile Pics” post.  You are hilarious! [editor’s note: I really didn’t write this answer and no money changed hands, I swear.]

Embarrassing moment:  Isn’t that what my blog is all about? [editor’s note: Why yes, it is.]

Good deed I did:  Not running over that bicyclist last night who cut in front of me in traffic while dressed completely in black with no light and no reflective thingys on his bike.  Really, I should have gunned it.

Indulgence:  Milk Chocolate.  Not the dark crap that is supposedly healthy.


155 thoughts on “First and Last…with Elyse from FiftyFourandAHalf

          1. You’re just trying to butt-er me up Darla. I was just kidding, I make these jokes all the time. How else would I survive?

  1. Yay! This is such a great way to showcase bloggers, DP, and I love the idea of first/last questions.

    Elyse, I took a field trip over to read your “Love (?) Story” post and the hourglass is STILL going on my comment. It was fantastic – as were these answers! Now about those Academy Awards…

    1. Darla is a wonder. And the questions really made me think. OH, and lie a bit.

      Thanks for visiting over there — the Love (?) Story is one of my favorites. As for my Oscars, they were for documentary film-making, which I have never done.

  2. Reblogged this on FiftyFourandAHalf and commented:
    Yes, I’m a two timer. A cheater. A blog whore. Yesterday, I was at Peg O’Leg’s. Today, I am chatting up Darla at She’s A Maineiac. Who knows what tomorrow shall bring. Bwwwwwwhahahahahahah

    1. Oh, you dirty, dirty blog whore you…leaving your words scattered all over the blogosphere like a common grammar tramp. Who have you become Elyse..or shall I refer to you as Madame Elyse. I’m actually glad you’re whoring it up and sharing these other great bloggers with us. This was great!

      1. Haha! I think Elyse’s new blog tagline should be:

        …nothing but a dirty, dirty blog whore/common grammar tramp…

        And I guess that makes me her pimp? Nah, just another blog whore. Sigh.

      2. Wait a minute here, Darla Bear – Elyse is one of MY girls. Are you trying to muscle in on my street corner? (tips over-sized patchwork, denim newsboy cap down low over eyes and hitches up white-belted, red, crushed velvet bell-bottoms in a threatening gesture.)

        1. Ladies, ladies, ladies, There is plenty of me for everybody.

          But cha know, I don’t know what I’m gonna do tomorrow when life goes back to normal and I have to actually work instead of playing around at your houses.

    1. I know Peg. What is it about me that I must just spread myself hither and yon like dirty socks around my bedroom ,,, Oh, I forgot I had been saving that particular tid bit for the next time I must answer questions …

        1. Gah! NOOOOO! I am dying now. My in-laws just gave us a box of Girl scout cookies and they were peanut butter creams. I felt like saying WHAT?! what is this crap? Nothing compares to Thin Mints!

  3. great idea! no time to read her blog now but I’ll follow and check it out soon. I’m new at this and my “reader” is a little bleak w/new stuff so I appreciate the recommendations….

  4. Dear Darla,

    Thank you so much for featuring me on the sidebar, on this post. You are a blogging wonder and I am so glad to be pals with you.

    Yes, it’s true. I commented without the slightest smidge of snark. And yes, it is me doing it. I have not been abducted (although I was in a meeting and wished I was).


    1. I love you, Elyse! (no snark here either) You had me at “all my relatives died on holidays”. Truly, you are da bomb. So happy to have gotten to know you these few years.Hope the snow didn’t paralyze the city for a second day and if not, you were abducted during your meeting.

      1. Oh, if only I’d been abducted by aliens during my interminable staff meeting … if only. Think of the posts I could write.

        Washington is back open for business — we got hardly any snow yesterday — 4 inches out here in the wilderness, less than one downtown. And they shut the place down. Maroons.

        And we will have many years together, Darla. I promise. Till dearth of words us do part.

  5. Awesome feature, Darla! (And great answers, Elyse!) I *love* hearing how couples met, so the link to your story was like icing on a cake. 🙂

  6. Well, well, well, Elyse. It seems we meet again. MWAHAHAHA.

    Seriously, girl. Are you taking over the blogosphere, or what? You. Are. Everywhere!!

    Oh, and I hate dark chocolate, too. Solidarity, lady!

      1. No,no Darla. You so crazy. Chocolate is not supposed to be a health food. It is supposed to be milky and sweet and delicious. Healthy? I spit in your general direction, healthy. (Not in your general direction, Darla)

    1. Misty, it’s you and me. Actually we can invite the dark chocolate folks too — they can have all the yucky dark ones in the box. You and me? We get the good stuff.

      I’m going to make you very jealous, though, Misty. I used to live in Switzerland where they loooooovveeee milk chocolate …

    1. I’m so happy to introduce you, Cheri! Darla is hilarious.

      And I think that you hit the reason why I am in such demand — it’s my Oscars! Everybody wants a piece of me now.

    1. My parking lot is undergoing construction, as is the building next door. The whole place is a war zone and so into the fray comes a dope on a bike on the sidewalk. Oy.

      But Darla asked for the Last good deed I did. The only other one I could think of was when I held back from posting about the bozo who stored ammunition in the oven.

      Perhaps I need to rethink my life, Frank.

  7. Hey, this is a great feature! Originality is so over rated…..I LOVE Elyse; she was one of my first “Follows” as I figure out how my reader worked. She is funny, smart, honest and liberal. How could we not love her!

    1. But it is the venue and the questions and the host that are original, Moms! And I didn’t know I was one of your early bloggin’ buddies! I’m so excited.

  8. Last year I was thinking about an old boyfriend – a guy whose legs were unfortunately much too short for his torso. I googled him and found out he had died. I felt really bad- that I should have tried harder to love his stubby legs.

  9. Hey, I think you might be onto something here, Elyse. No more blogging on YOUR blog, just chat briefly with another blogger then post the pingback! VERY clever! 😀
    And who in their right mind would NOT consider their dog a person? The very thought!

    1. You know, this is actually way harder. I have to be nice and clever and don’t get to grump too much. All of these things are totally out of character.

      And Cooper’s birthday is coming up! But you know, non dog people don’t understand.

        1. He will be 105. I will be writing something about him tonight for posting tomorrow. So you will just have to check your sarcasm at the door for that post, John. Oh, and for all others!

          1. Hey, I NEVER get sarcastic about a loved one, regardless of the number of legs! (Just thinking that if you’re the Queen, hubby is either the King or Prince Consort – like Phillip – and that would make Cooper the Crown Prince, no? Or does your land have a different ascension pattern?)

    1. I am soooooo ashamed, Georgette. Really.

      Besides, it’s really hard to be funny while proclaiming yourself to be Mother Theresa. Try it — it’s harder than you think!

      And I’ll be hanging out at home most of the time. Although I will be on the Green Study in a few days too. Apparently I am a tumbleweed.

        1. I wasn’t worried, Georgette. You know me. You know that I wouldn’t really hit a bicyclist with my car, just with the sharpest part of me — my pen. (Although because he was in black at night without anything that made him show up in the slightest, someone else very well may — ooh I guess I’m still mad at him for the scare he gave me).

          You know, I should take out that “Ouch” — it was more of a “You hit me” sort of ouch, though, not “this is a humiliatingly small number of hits” ouch! But my page really does need to be cleaned up. Someday soon …


    1. It’s nice to meet you, Scream. What a great blog name! And while I do have great taste in socks, Darla gets the credit for the ones in the picture. I think she may get the credit for the feet and the sandals, too.

  10. This is so great! I was in my writing cave and didn’t even see my shadow once yesterday!
    Thanks for the introduction to Elyse! Love her “firsts” and her “lasts!”

    1. Hi again, Susie. I just answered your comment over at Peg’s. We bloggers do get around, don’t we.

      Darla asks some tough questions — I’m not even sure I got the answers right. Sigh. I’ll have to try again.

  11. Ah, I remember the Oil Heat Centennial well. What a year that was. The parades, “Oil Heat Week” on NBC, the fireworks that led to widespread fires (because of all the oil)… good times.

    1. It was a glorious year. Actually, it was one of the hardest jobs I ever had, because nobody would take me seriously when I called asking for support. My only consolation was that I was not responsible for enacting “Mule Appreciation Day” which some other schmuck got stuck doing. (I’m not making that one up, either.)

    1. No. Having to spend my own money on socks instead of fun things made me realize I was a grown up and had to pay my own way. It sucked. I still resent having to buy socks!

    1. Darla is a wonderful hostess. No doubt about it. She keeps the paparazzi mostly at bay but gives them just enough access to satisfy your ego. It’s an art.

      1. I do mean The Ganja. by the way….will you be my next interview victim? say….for the glorious month of June? or August? Hmm? I promise you I’ll customize the questions to fit you. Here’s one: First time your brother did something really mean to you…. OR Last time you slow danced to a Shaun Cassidy song while kissing his poster.

      1. Thanks for, ummmm, making my life Complete, Darla. Really.

        But I realized that my “First” job was a real job but not a first. I don’t think it qualifies even as the first job where I had to do something really stupid.

        I’m so ashamed …

        1. Life is always confusing, Angie … Who knows what we were talking about. Because the box I’m typing in doesn’t hang with your comment(s). I think it is another way WP is screwing with us.

  12. It’s a great Idea Darla. I revisited your blog after a long long time. And I am really happy seeing what you have in store for us in your blog. I am a big fan of Elyse and her blog. So I am really happy seeing you have featured her blog this week.

  13. Pingback: Biting Me | FiftyFourandAHalf

  14. Pingback: How Do You Love Me? The Show Me Post | FiftyFourandAHalf

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