Newsflash: We all have feminine and masculine tendencies. Naturally, some of us might be more on one side than the other regardless of our gender. Some of us might have an equal balance of both. These traits might be due to our childhoods or because we were born that way.
What I’m saying is — enough already. Sheesh.
Still some people automatically lump either gender into tidy little boxes. Men like sports. Women like makeup. Men burp and fart. Women like makeup. Men scratch themselves a lot. Women tell men to stop burping, farting and scratching themselves and give us their credit card already so we can go buy more makeup.
We all know it’s ridiculous to overgeneralize based on gender. I’m a good example. I grew up with five brothers. And last time I checked, I am a woman.
Here are a few facts about me:
- I hate makeup.
- I rarely wear makeup.
- Once a year when I wear makeup for a special occasion, I have no idea how to apply it so I don’t end up looking like this:
- I love sports. I like to play them, I like to watch them on TV.
- I live for Super Bowl Sunday.
- I love to listen to bands like Alice in Chains.
- I am strong. I’m wily. I could drop you like a sack of bricks with one swift chop to your trachea.
- I hate washing my hair. I hate brushing my hair. I hate my hair.
- Shoes are evil. Especially any shoe that is not a sneaker or flip-flop.
- I hate purses. I have no idea why people spend tons of money on them. I walk into a purse store like Coach and my mind switches off. Picking out a purse is like watching my horribly-applied clown makeup dry. I prefer to just stick my wallet into my jacket pocket and call it good.
- If I carry a purse, (I own exactly one) I will spend the entire time flinging it around while yelling “What in the hell am I supposed to do with this stupid thing?! It’s like an anchor around my neck and I swear I will die right here in the middle of this fracking Coach store if I have to drag it around one more minute!”
- I hate clothes shopping. I hate clothes. If I could wear the same outfit every day — say, a large potato sack with a rope belt — I’d be happy.
- I have no idea what pants go with which shirt. Or what’s considered trendy or fashionable. Because I. Do. Not. Care. (also, I have bad taste in clothes, see above)
- I hate shopping in general. Going to the mall is cruel and unusual punishment. While my husband will agonize over which coffee pot to buy, I’ll slink slowly to the floor in agony, crying “for the love of all that is holy JUST PICK ONE SO WE CAN GET OUT OF THIS HELLHOLE!” Then I hit him in the head with my giant ugly purse.
- I don’t like to cook.
- I don’t like to bake.
- I do love to eat.
- I don’t like to clean. I will clean of course, but I won’t like it.
- I hate math but I’m good at it. I also excel in science and medical stuff. (that’s right, the technical term is “stuff”)
- I love to play basketball and I’ve got a killer hook shot.
- I love to play video games for hours, like Tomb Raider and Mario Kart.
- I actually rather enjoyed all of the Iron Man and Avenger movies.
- Sometimes I burp. Very long and loud burps that rattle the windows.
So is your mind blown? No? Fine. (ahem)
What about you guys? How are you unlike/like your gender’s stereotypes?